It’s been too long.

I used to visit with you two or three times a week, always looking forward to the quiet time we would spend together. Depending on my day, I’d laugh, play, or be adventurous (and sometimes cry) during our visits. It felt wrong if I didn’t see you at least twice a week.

Gradually, work and life in general pulled me away from you. Our visits went from two days a week then to one day a week until eventually, weeks would go by without a visit. I started to do that slow fade. You know the move, the one where you gradually remove yourself from someone’s life, and before they know it, you are gone completely. You wouldn’t let that happen though. Every now and then, you would find a way to remind me that you are here. Just waiting for my return.

When I finally show up, many months have passed. I am not quite sure where to begin. Where did we last leave off? Has it really been that long?

Although the room is full of other people, I remain focused on repairing this relationship. You know when to challenge me. You give me the courage to go to my very edge and the knowledge of when to back off. You welcome me with open arms. No judgment here.

When “I can’t” enters my mind, you remind me that yes, I can.

There is no failure. If I try, I have succeeded. Maybe I won’t reach that apex, but I won’t stop trying.

I have met some wonderful souls through knowing you. They too have taught me about kindness, positivity, and believing that every day brings new beginnings; to pursue that which brings the most happiness to our lives.

Towards the end of this visit, I am reminded exactly why I spend time with you. It means being removed from all of the clutter of life’s distractions. No TV. No cell phone. No e-mail. Simplicity. The inner dialogue stops.

I am refreshed. I am inspired. I am calm.

Thank you for these gifts.

As I prepare to leave, I silently promise that I will return. And this time, it won’t be before too long.

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Editor: Bryonie Wise

Photo: elephant journal archives