April 19, 2014

Are You Forcing It? ~ John Kalinowski & Jami Patterson


Do you ever catch yourself trying to make something happen, or agonizing because something isn’t going exactly your way?

I do it all the time.

This may sound silly, but I’ve made a habit of remembering the Beatles song, “Let it be.” (“Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be… Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.”) It just reminds me to stop holding on so tight, that the only thing I can control is myself, and that there comes a point when I’ve done everything I can do and it’s time to step back to allow the chips to fall where they may.

Otherwise, I’m just running around like a crazy person trying to force the chips to fall exactly the way I want them to. Not only is that the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, it’s also the way many of us live our daily lives.

I was going over my business finances recently and found myself having all sorts of feelings about it. The words I kept hearing in my head were, “I should be further along than this.” “I should be making this much money and have a book published” and “I should have a bigger office and a fancier this and a better that, and it should all have happened yesterday.”

This all comes from that nearly universal human affliction of feeling like we’re not enough, haven’t done enough, don’t have enough (money, beauty, love, wisdom) and there’s clearly something wrong with us.

Nope, there’s nothing wrong.

The only thing wrong is that we’re wasting time and energy on beating the hell out of ourselves, which is costing us even more time and energy, which we could be using to make ourselves happy and/or move ourselves forward.

If we want something, we should prioritize it, create a time line, find some way to hold ourselves accountable, show up for it, and go.

But those draining, self-limiting thoughts rob us from appreciating what we’ve already accomplished, and leave us with less energy to move toward the things that we still want to accomplish.

Every time we start beating ourselves up and catch ourselves trying to force those chips into the right place, let us remember, “Let it be.” Chorus please.

Have a beautiful week!

—Happy Warrior

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Editorial Assistant: Karissa Kneeland / Editor: Renée Picard

Photo: flickr


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John Kalinowski & Jami Patterson