“I want to live just once,” I whispered to my own shadow one lonely night.

“I want to live once and taste freedom on the tip of my tongue.

I want the fire of determination to burn inside me and keep me warm on a cold night like this instead of the cigarette that I smoke.

I want to taste the stinging love as it rolls down my throat, tensing every muscle in my body, and please me with the pain.

I want to feel loved till I evaporate into a million particles and float away with the winds of summer.

I want to smile so hard that my cheeks hurt and my heart explodes as I drink the poison of happiness from the hands of my own life.

I want to break down and cry like a thunderstorm that takes everything down with it.

And once that all is done, I want to face death. I want to look into its eyes as it makes love with me one last time. I want to feel death holding me close before taking me with it forever into the land from where no one can ever return. ”
“I just want to live once,” I whispered to my shadow as it disappeared with the last flicker of the burning candle.

Author: Javaria Waseem 

Editor: Emily Bartran

Photo: martinak15/Flickr