May 15, 2015

Love & Life: The Collision of Soulmates.

couple forest

Our true soulmate will never ask us to be anything other than what we are but in order to be ready for that we need to be ready to be everything we truly are.

“Unless its mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it’s a waste of our time. There are too many mediocre things in life; love shouldn’t be one of them.” ~ Unknown

Sometimes, when we think of the greatest love of our life, the first love we usually think of is the “teaching” love. We think about the one we crossed paths with in order for them to help teach us about what we really need and want from a romantic relationship.

But just as we crossed paths with them, we are meant to let them go once the lesson is complete.

There is more to an amazing soul authentic relationship than love—it’s being able to have our lives align and fit together like pieces in a beautiful puzzle. Sometimes we have pieces that almost fit but sometimes we have pieces that we continually try to fit together although we know they will never fit.

No matter how much we care about someone, to admit that a piece of the puzzle is missing can be difficult. But, for all those teetering on the edge of a new beginning, know that there is a something else waiting out there—the kind of love that will show us why it never worked out with anyone else.

It’s all about finding that missing piece, and trusting that, if we let it, life will always reward us with a new beginning.

Love versus Life: The missing piece

“What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be.” ~ Unknown

Even though we may love and care about someone deeply, sometimes we just have to accept that although there is nothing really wrong with the relationship, it doesn’t mean that everything is okay with it either.

Not all love is wonderful. Sometimes being in love can make us feel like something took our breath away and that we are told to sit quietly in the corner, while the rest of the world dances around in glorious harmony.

I had this type of love once. I had my wings clipped and I was told to walk the line. I was given ultimatums and bruises on my skin and heart. I was squished and cramped into a box that someone else had decided I should exist within. I was told to look, but never dare to touch.

Until the day came when I learned why the caged bird truly does sing—it sings of freedom that, although it is lost, will never be forgotten. And with that, I made the decision to set my heart free.

It was through this process of death and rebirth that I learned not just a lot about myself, but about the human condition and what it means to love and truly accept another.

I had to learn the hard way, through trials and tribulations that a soulmate will never want to impose their desires and wants upon us or give us timelines. They will see that our greatness lies not in living life like everyone else, but in finding our own way.

I’ve learned that the love we deserve is the very one that will make us a better person and ask us to reach for our dreams so that we become our most honest authentic self.

I have also come to believe that there is the life changing, our-lives-just-aren’t-the-same-without-them type of love. It’s the kind of love that no matter how hard we try, once we’ve dipped our toes into, we just can’t stay away and we certainly can’t ever forget about it.

Not only have I dipped my toes into a love like this, I’ve taken secret midnight swims in it, letting the water caress my skin and create dreams beneath the waves in my heart. I haven’t yet been able to swim in it for nearly as long as I’d like, but now that I’ve had a taste of it, no other love will do. No matter what, I just can’t help myself from coming back for more.

Love and Life: The soulmate love

“Intimacy is not purely physical. It’s the act of connecting with someone so deeply you feel like you can see into their soul.” ~ Ann Nguyen

This is the collision of the soulmate love. This is finding that missing piece that sometimes we didn’t even know was missing until we’ve found it, it fits so well we don’t ever want to let it go.

This is the kind of love when two people know who they are individually, what they want their life to look like and on top of that make each other’s blood rush and knees go weak.

Now, that’s the good stuff.

Soulmate love is like soft flannel against our bare skin, steaming morning coffee smelling like hazelnuts and fresh cream, homemade chocolate chip cookies that are still warm, salty skin and warm breezes smelling like honeysuckle. Simply put, it’s everything.

It won’t look like anything we’ve ever had before though, so sometimes it’s hard to believe that it’s real. Lying to ourselves, or making up excuses won’t work though, because just like when we wake from a restless dream induced sleep it will still be there, haunting us, until we are ready to accept it.

Our soulmate will continue to challenge us, keep us on our toes and make sure we never become satisfied with the mundane. They will not tell us what we want to hear, but what we need to hear. They often won’t say the right thing or do the right thing and they will never take it easy on us.

Sometimes it takes a long time for soulmates to find their way, especially because this type of love does not follow the rules or play pretence with our emotions. It’s going to be raw, real, over exposed and honest.

It’s going to taste like wild honey and smell like juniper, it’s going to keep coming back to show us the possibility until there’s nothing left to do but say yes, and take a chance at greatness.

Soulmates still argue, they have their good days and their bad days, they have their tears and fears, but the difference is, they will have an appreciation and respect for our soul and most likely will know more than we even tell them.

I’ve learned that when I do love, I don’t love someone for the man he might be some day or the man I want him to be. I don’t love him for how much cash he may have hidden away or what type of car he wants to drive.

When my heart opens to love, it’s because I am accepting him exactly as he is in this moment, with the knowledge that the only guarantee is that we both will change.

It’s knowledge that the soulmate loves the soul first, the spark behind our eyes and the way our wild heart glows.

To live life with a soulmate is to partake on the greatest adventure—it is unknown and wild, carefree and brutal, rich and honest, deep and meaningful. It’s that once-in-a-life-time kind of love.

It’s choosing each other, taking each day one at a time, and authentically making up our own rules.

There exists a truth in love that is timeless. It won’t be perfect or free from challenges but we will know it when we find it because it will speak to our hearts in a way nothing else or, more importantly, no one else ever has.

It’s not practical, and rarely has good timing—but if we let it, it will change our lives.

“Throughout this life you will meet one person who is unlike any other. You could talk to this person for hours and never get bored. You could tell them anything and they would never judge you. This person is your soul mate, your best friend. Don’t ever let them go.” ~ Unknown



To my Soulmate I Choose not to Love.


Author: Kate Rose

Editor: Katarina Tavčar

Photo: Yağmur Adam/Flickr

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