August 10, 2015

Your Soul Matters: Life Reconciliation 101.

Hartwig HKD/ Flickr

Caution: adult language below! 

How often do we think about our soul desires?

How often do we actively listen to the information our conscious mind, body, and soul are sending us?

Our social conditioning tells us this information is an unreliable way of making life decisions, that we should instead put our trust and faith in the opinions of the people around us, in what society tells us is the right path, and in our subconscious response to the situation.

These are the most unreliable, fleeting and flippant information gathering systems we could base life decisions off.

Doing will never sustain a healthy, happy life and will inevitably cause a large amount of pain and suffering.

I’ve battled with this my whole life. I listened to the opinions of others, society and my often bizarre subconscious responses and tried to fit myself into the box the world wanted me to fit in. I took on jobs, relationships and allowed situations into my life, in the firm belief I was doing what was best for me, because that’s what everyone and everything I was basing my life decisions off told me to do.

While I tried to convince myself, deep inside me there was a voice whispering “Are you sure about this Rachel” and a quiet but clear feeling that felt like a massive question mark [spread] throughout my body.

I had been operating completely out of alignment. We as humans seem to be incredibly good at adapting to this way of living. We go months, years, decades being out of alignment with ourselves and barely notice.

But eventually, that whispering voice becomes a blood curdling, arm-hair raising scream; and the quiet but clear question mark becomes a massive fucking exclamation mark, both which we can no longer ignore. Not only can we no longer ignore them, but we also can’t bear to hold the weight of what’s now abundantly clear to us—that we actually chose this for ourselves—and this is where the pain and suffering come in. What tends to ensue—at least in my experience—is a monumental fucking train wreck.

This is an individual learning experience for everyone. It is something we have to go through ourselves in order to see. I want to help.  I’m going to share with you a set of questions I’ve started to routinely ask myself, which create space for me to hear my soul.

3 soul questions to ask ourselves regularly:

1) Is this job/person/situation good for my soul or calling?

2) Is this job/person/situation creating lightness or heaviness in my heart or body?

3) Is this job/person/situation expanding or contracting my life?

Where the answer is both, which is often the case because life is complex and messy, it’s important to dig deeper. For further clarification ask these questions:

1) What am I giving up to sustain this situation?

If I am giving up my creativity, innocence, my fire or my light, and it’s a permanent thing and/or is being taken for granted by the job/person/situation, then I’d suggest considering taking action to change the situation.

2) Is the situation creating qualities in me that make me a better or worse person?

Sometimes, shit happens. Our parents are assholes, our job sucks, things didn’t turn out the way we thought they would etc. Often these situations are catalysts for deep growth in our lives and that’s why we find ourselves there. So ask yourself what qualities this is creating in you. Is it patience, perseverance, inner strength, or is it fear, insecurity, sadness or loneliness? If it’s the latter, do something about it.

3) Do I have healthy support networks in place to help me cope? Who am I talking through the situation with? What self-care strategies do I have in place?

If I don’t have any, it’s important to get some. In complex life situations where I am  struggling to cope, negative behaviours are born. Without adequate support networks, I could be creating unhealthy coping mechanisms and added trauma which is only going to extend your healing time.

This process is based on the idea that no one is a better teacher for our souls than we are. And it’s true. We know ourselves better than anyone, and we must start learning to trust ourselves and our life knowledge more. Your thriving soul is a crucially important part of living, and yet we often unintentionally sacrifice it for jobs/people and situations.

Start putting your conscious mind, body and soul first, because really, what can you trust more in this life?


Relephant Read:

She was Done. 

Author: Rachel Browne 

Apprentice editor: Lindsay Carricarte

Image: Flickr/Hartwig HKD

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