Excuse me if the tone of this article isn’t warm and fuzzy. If I don’t say, “no matter what happens everything is going to be alright and that all choices are equal and whatever perspective you take will work out just fine for you.”
That is not what I am here to say—at all.
I am also not here, this time, to hold anybody’s hand and coddle the truth from deaf ears.
No, this is is a strong message.
This is a forceful message about the path forward.
First, let me tell you about my week. I live in the country in a very remote part of Northern Canada (it snowed last week) and I haven’t been to “town” (what we call going to the small city near us) in at least 10 days.
I have basically been at home—a lot of the time by myself. Doing basically the same things every day. Scrolling Facebook, cooking lunches, going for walks with my dog in the woods.
This could sound boring, but here is the truth:
Even without “going anywhere” everything in my life has changed. It has changed multiple times. My life has turned and twisted, taken unexpected corners too fast, slowed down just in time. Become confused and settled. All in the course of staying at home.
This is just like meditation.
We sit, we don’t move, we focus our attention and everything changes.
This is the inevitable.
I can’t stress this any more to you.
No matter what you do everything is going to change.
In the course of the last 10 days, the potential of my finances has changed, my comfort level in my intimate relationship has changed, the direction I am taking my business has changed, the way I am eating has changed and my children’s schedule has changed, without my trying.
It just has.
My concept of God and life itself is always changing.
And I am not trying to say my life is amazing or unique or anything like that at all.
I am trying to say the exact opposite.
This is normal.
Everything changes—every moment—no matter if we go somewhere busy or go somewhere quiet. No matter if we try to change our life or try to keep it the same.
The changing state of our lives is out of our control.
I know that makes most of us want to cover our ears and hide under the covers, but the quicker we accept that everything changing all the time isn’t in our hands the sooner we can settle down and stop trying to make everything stand still or go faster or be something it is not.
Fighting change is the real definition of suffering.
Wanting everything to be different then it is is crazy-making and makes us act in inconceivable ways in our attempt to feel a little safer—to feel a little more in control.
I don’t know what changes each one of you reading this are facing. I know for some they are hard. I know they hurt.
For others they are glorious.
But for all of us, change is inevitable and the sooner we embrace it, the less we will suffer—and the more we can bring our newfound strength to the important task of helping others.
Author: Ruth Lera
Editor: Toby Israel
Photo: ™ Pacheco/Flickr