December 11, 2015

The Only New Year Resolutions We Need to Make.


It’s that time of the year again.

For many, the new year is a time for change and repurposing. One of the most well-known traditions that people practice during that time of year is setting a list of resolutions.

Resolutions can include pursuing better jobs, quitting smoking, diet improvement, buying a new car, traveling and so on.

I’ve had similar lists in the past and frankly most of them never came to fruition. The ones that did, however, made no remarkable change in myself, others, or the world.

I came to an incredible realization exactly two years ago.

Most of the time, our resolutions concern solely ourselves: our bodies, our health, our future.

They rarely focus on what is outside of our own selves.

That being said, how about making an expansive change this year? How about a New Year’s resolution list that lasts forever and is not bound to 365 days?

What about a list that benefits me, the world and helps with my spiritual growth?

Three years ago, two weeks before New Year’s Day, I picked up a paper and a pen and made a list that changed my life. Since then, I’ve made no other list and stopped following the convention of setting yearly New Year resolutions. I had an honest conversation with myself and took note of what should be amended, internally. This list included so many points that my ego loathed. But I did it, and I’m still practicing them to this day.

Below are 20 long-term resolutions everyone should make for a better self and a more peaceful world:

Forgiveness is easy. It is simply deciding to stop punishing or blaming the person for what they did. The only thing that stands between us and forgiveness is our ego. Move it away.

Accept people for who they are, don’t try to change them. Accept circumstances and events. Acceptance can bring about a wonderful result to our lives.

Let go of the past.
The past lives in our minds—it’s as simple as this. It is long gone. It is not here anymore. Its presence only hinders our ability to live in the presence moment and thoroughly abolishes our capability of thinking of a better future.

Let go of fear.
As long as fear lives in us, we won’t be able to take risks, to live or to do as we please. Fear is an illusion. It’s the past’s best friend. They both have pitched tents in our minds and refuse to leave. Destroy their tents and kick them out!

Stop judging.
Let’s stop judging people. We are not in their shoes, hence we don’t have the slightest idea of who they are or why they do what they’re doing. All is happening for a good reason.

Be kind.
I think anyone who hasn’t practiced kindness doesn’t yet know what the true meaning of life is. The unexplainable energy we feel when we’re kind is the ultimate proof that kindness and compassion are our two main missions on earth.

Refrain from anger.
Anger is nonsense. Could your really imagine staying angry for the rest of your life? It is only a temporary feeling that is tied with negative energy. Let’s count to ten before losing our temper.

Don’t compare.
Live as if you’re alone in this universe. Comparing ourselves with others only drives our focus on other people instead of driving it towards ourselves. This, in return, makes us lose abundant energy that can be quite helpful in other endeavors.

Don’t argue.
It took me more than 15 years to realize that arguing never solves anything. It’s like walking down a path that leads to nowhere. Eventually, we will get tired and lie awake on the floor.

Love yourself.
Starting with loving ourselves is the keystone to everything in life. Loving ourselves is pivotal to keeping ourselves protected from toxic people and toxic energies. It is also a good beginning to learn how to love others.

Love others.
Now that we have worked on loving ourselves, we can step onto the field of loving everyone unconditionally and equally. Without love, people won’t be able to survive. Our being is thoroughly dependent on receiving and giving love.

Appreciate your family, friends and loved ones. Let’s appreciate our life. We shouldn’t waste one minute not feeling grateful that we are still breathing. With appreciation, we open a whole new door that only leads to happiness.

Understand others.
This was amongst the list I had created three years back; and it was one of my points. We always think that we have a complete understanding of others and what they are going through. But the truth is we don’t. Understand them and believe them. It works magic.

Listening is mainly giving others the chance to be heard. Nothing feels greater than being heard. It is an effective way of exchanging words that contain immense energy and meaning. It’s wonderful.

Don’t mindread.
I am someone who reads minds a lot and I hate to say it, but most of the time I am mistaken. We should never fail to ask for the truth and listen to it. Don’t mindread. Listen and understand.

Communication is key to building a better understanding between ourselves and others. Without it, we can never have better relationships with those who are around us. Communication is an art we must excel at.

It wasn’t very long ago when I learnt the importance of sharing. Being essentially alone in India for backpacking taught me that moments are never valuable unless shared with others. Share love, happiness and yourself. Sharing is happiness.

If we look around us, we can see that there are plenty of teachers we can learn from. We have nature, people and events that can teach us abundant of lessons. Let’s learn from there so we can grow.

Let go of grudges.
Grudges teach us nothing but how to hold toxic energy towards others. They live in our minds and completely take over our being. Let’s let go of it and start afresh with our so-called enemies.

What’s better than this resolution? I vowed to practice it every second of my life. What does life mean to you? Set your definition and do it.

If life came with a handbook, everything would be so much easier for us. Nevertheless, we have to find out almost every secret by ourselves, and that’s the beauty of it.

For me, I realized that our sole purpose is to work on spiritually evolving ourselves. We are here to love, give and be kind. If we want a better world, we should start working with the person we are today.



New Year’s Resolution: Same Failure, Different Year.


Author: Elyane Youssef

Editor: Caitlin Oriel

Image: Sarah J./Flickr

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