This article originally appeared on MeetMindful. elephant is proud to share their content, and we think you’ll love them just as much as we do. Happy reading! ~ Ed.
Meeting new people can be nerve wracking. Especially when you’re just starting on the internet dating scene.
I think the web is an amazing place to learn to trust your instinct, be yourself and be present right off the bat. If you’ve been single for awhile you know that in the olden days (when we actually had to go out and meet people) we could rely on all of our senses. We could see, hear, smell, touch and feel what was going on with our date at first meeting.
Today you’ve got to rely on your intuition and instinct, and there is a difference. Instinct is literally your gut feeling. Sometimes a pain or bad feeling in your mid section can warn of unpleasant experiences ahead. Intuition, on the other hand, is a subtle experience. Gaining awareness of what you think, say and feel about yourself when you’re with your date. You’ve got to be honest with yourself these days. However, judging, transferring your issues or taking someone’s “inventory” while on a date will ensure your lack of companionship.
A few times in my life I’ve dated from the internet. I really enjoyed the experience because it taught me how to be in the moment when originally, my focus was on fear and judgment. I learned to experience detachment and acceptance of others. I met a series of interesting people and everyone I met, I read within the first hour.
One guy was very engaging in the instant message and email stage of courtship…but off putting. He was “busy all the time,” so when we finally got on the phone I definitely had a sense of familiarity. In the first two minutes of the call, I said to myself, “what a sad sack,” and then of course, went out with him anyway. As you might expect, no love connectionthere. His cup was half-empty, he was dominantly self serving and used his self importance to cover up his fear of emotional pain and intimacy.
I learned all of that in the three dates I had with him, but I had initially wrapped it up with a nice little bow in those first two minutes. It was one of the biggest lessons I learned about accepting people as they are and finding peace in the decisions I make from the information I have. If I’d listened to myself, I wouldn’t have gone on date one.
Listen to yourself.
The real meat of reading someone is paying attention to the subtle thoughts and behaviors that you have while in their presence. Truth transcends time and space and the information will always be there as you train your awareness. Nothing says you have to overcome discomfort or just go out with someone to be nice. It’s important to be open-hearted but not compromise on the elements that you value the most.
Pay attention to these five things:
Your Initial Feelings
Paying attention to the subtle images and feelings that you have with someone will give you a lot of information. The truth will never offend you. If someone says or does something that offends you, it may not be about their character, but more an indicator that you don’t have the same values or the best compatibility based on place in life, age or circumstance. Keep in mind that these little emotional or psychic messages are your spirits way of telling you about your needs.
Charming people can be captivating and enchanting, so pay attention to where in your body you have feelings. The lower gut is an emotional connection and may let you know that you have similar emotional traumas. The stomach area is…
…Follow us over to MeetMindful to finish reading Decode Your Relationship Compatibility In One Hour.
Author: Tracee Dunblazier
Editor: Katarina Tavčar
Photo: Veri Ivanova/Unsplash