June 9, 2016

Finding Intimacy in Simplicity.

touching first date couple tension

They had a simple love, but it was tender.

It was the kind of sweet that melts in your mouth, the kind that comes complete with password-less phones, “honey, can you check that text for me,” and leaving the door open during bathroom visits.

A love filled with laughs and dreams, encouraging words, “babe, I think you should just go for it, what have you got to lose?”

Intertwined limbs and his hands caressing her feet—how she loved his gentle touch on her tired soles.

She searches, now, for more intimacy—after two years being together, the flame has turned to embers.

How do people stay together for 50 plus years and keep the flame burning?

Time flies in these lifestyles of busy days.

She realizes that intimacy burns brightest in the smallest of moments:

When he wakes up in the morning to go to the bathroom and then crawls back into bed to cuddle and embrace her warmth.

When she rubs his shoulder to break up the scar tissue and relieve him of post-surgery pain.

When he doesn’t want to do yoga, but studies her movements and emotions as she goes into half pigeon pose.

When they set up the hammock and lie at opposite ends to look at each other with half-shut eyes, swaying in the wind and basking in the suns rays.

When he makes her his “famous” flavored salmon on the George-Foreman when she is exhausted or not feeling well…or even if she is feeling well.

He always cooks her dinner.

They always nudge one another to spend quality time together. Phones and social media are intimacy killers, and they realize that. Always conscious of putting the phones away or turning them off when they are together.

She finds intimacy in their cozy walks through the woods in his backyard, and listening to every creature’s rustle, chirp, bark, howl and sing.

She stays curious about what goes on inside his head. Her primary love language revolves around the power of words.

Sometimes she gets frustrated when says he is thinking about nothing.

She wants him to say more than just “nothing.”

She wants to hear about his thinking of how much he loves the freckles on her back, how he wishes he could bottle up every one of her laughs and listen to them later, or that he loves the way she loves all creatures—except the 13 daddy long leg spiders in his bathroom that he refuses to clean up.

But she is slowly starting to understand that he is a man of few words.

His thoughts are simple; his heart is filled with a quiet, gentle love.

Her love is vivacious and her brain is full.

And so, they learn from each other.

She learns that love doesn’t have to be a fire that roars all throughout the night. There are moments when the fire will be subtle and beautiful.

He learns that he loves her and all her wildness. And sometimes, it’s nice to think of something sweet to say so that she can remember it all day.

Look small, think simple, and you will find that intimacy can be found in every single moment—so long as we make ourselves available to letting it in.


Author: Mariyah Martinez

Editors: Renée Picard; Katarina Tavčar

Image: instantvantage at Flickr 

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