November 17, 2019

Are we actually Healing or are we just Shopping?


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When we are deep in our healing process, it is so easy to place the responsibility of healing on something external, outside ourselves.

As we stand in the modern-day space of healing as a commodity—crystals, essential oils, classes, books, workshops, endless services, programs, alternative therapies, oracle cards, supplements, diets, podcasts, drugs—it feels like healing is something that we can take off the shelf and buy.

Like a lot of mystics and seekers, I subscribe to many of these modern-day trappings of healing, and I even provide what I can in this realm, as it is part of the reason why I am incarnated at this time (I suspect you likely are too; everyone has a healing gift to share).

As a part of the overall process, I do believe that many of these physical offerings and objects have their time and place in healing work. I don’t know who I would be without the printed words from many of my teachers, the epic healing spaces that I have been privileged to be a part of, or the work that I like to bring to every single aspect of my life.

I am an avid book reader of the self-help variety. I have an extensive crystal collection. The proliferation of oracle decks, tarot cards, and vitamins for decalcifying the pineal gland in our household has met an all-time high.

The truth is that I struggle most days with negative thoughts. I am tired a lot. I’ve cried every single morning for the better part of the past month.

No amount of crystals or oracle cards or whatever new self-care, fix-your-life fad has seemed to help me. At a certain point, we are at the end of the rope and completely and utterly shoved between a rock and a hard place.

The only thing currently true for me on my healing journey is remembering that we can make a choice, and we have the ability to come home to this sacred truth every single day. Tending to it like a newborn coddled in our hands, watching it breathe, we hold our choice. Not so much the duality of choosing one thing over another, but the innate power in having a choice at all and sitting with that magic, the fecund possibility.

We make choices. All the time. Every single day.

Mostly in how we choose to show up in the world.

We can either choose to unconsciously drink the sorrows of the world and ourselves and drown in them as a result; or we can choose to do our sacred work to transmute, transform, and soften them so that the people after us don’t come up against such devastating challenges and so that we are more equipped to face the personal challenges that lie ahead.

The essence of choice cannot be sold or bought. It cannot be held for profit, nor can it be marketed and put on a shelf.

Choice is a quiet reclamation.

The quiet whisper that says “get up.”

The little nudge toward a vision that asks more of us.

The split second we decide to take action or ease into rest.

Only when we take the long journey inward and face the choices we make, and are prepared to see the truth, can the real healing begin. By reflecting and making choices in alignment with the vision we hold for ourselves and the world we want to live in, we heal as a result.

The stories we tell, the things we’ve held onto, whether conscious or automatic response, we must face boldly and bravely so that we can cultivate the sovereign power we rightfully deserve.

We cannot purchase healing.

It cannot be bottled, shelved, or priced. Healing has no second quarter earnings. It does not care how much money we have to offer.

Healing is what happens when we freely enact our power of will without fear.

In a time when the illusion of healing can be sold as a good, we turn it back to the bare boned prayer of choice. The silent actions that shape the life we want to live. The small sustained acts that bring us closer to wholeness. The cyclical realization that this is a journey, a trip to be taken while packing light.

In each choice lies the potential to heal. The opportunity to open oneself to the miraculous experience of love, loss, gratitude, and grief, and to be able to hold it all. Healing is the ability to create or eliminate space, followed just behind the choice to open our awareness.

When we are on this wild healing ride, it can be tough to discern whether or not we are actually healing or whether we are going shopping to distract ourselves from the truths and patterns of choices that lie inside. When we step into the present moment and feel the energy of our choice, the raw ability to act, we call all of our power back to ourselves as a result.

Real healing asks a lot of us.

It asks us to lay our bones out to dry so that we may reconstruct our lives by design, by choice. Healing asks us to carefully select where each thing will be placed, how we will move forward, how we will function in a dysfunctional world.

Time and time again, when we feel the need to project our healing outside of ourselves, we can instead return home and tend to our ability to choose. When things become too much, so much so that we “need” a new healing crystal to fill the space, we can sit in the moment of sacred pause and catch the whisper of our authentic choice on the wind.

When a rock and a hard place threatens to flatten us under the weight of “spiritual” goods, we can come back to the true decision at hand. We can give ourselves over and over again to the process of standing in our power, beholden only to the unfolding mystery that that we enact through our will and response.

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