View this post on Instagram
A Hurricane kept me from Meeting Ram Dass: a Letter to my Hero.
September 14, 2017
Dear Baba Ram Dass,
I’m in Florida right now—awaiting a hurricane. I was supposed to fly out and meet you this week, but as you see, things have changed.
Over the past few months, I have been conducting interviews, asking people to reflect on joy and suffering. The more I interviewed these people, the more I saw the divine alive within them and myself.
It was a most beautiful thing. It seemed every question I had prepared to ask you was answered inadvertently by these people.
As I continued my project, it occurred to me that everything I sought for my trip to Maui was right here in these folks, in my little Florida beach town, with my family, my friends, in the wind, in the ocean waves. I must admit, a number of times I joked to people, “You know, I don’t need to meet Ram Dass—he’s already here!”
Little did I know that line was going to bite me in the butt!
Two days ago, as I prepared anxiously for my trip to Maui, we heard about Hurricane Irma brewing out at sea. People started to get scared. My husband assured me that he and the kids would be fine, that I should still go. He knew the sacrifices I had made for this trip.
However, I did not feel settled with this, so I went for a walk around the neighborhood. As I walked, I heard an inner voice speak to me with love and conviction:
“You need to stay. You’re not meant to go to Maui.”
Considering that I had been speaking about nothing but my trip to meet you, this message was quite jarring—but it was clear. An exquisitely beautiful lesson was coming to me in the form of a really big storm.
Why cross an ocean and leave my family and my community in an attempt to better understand unconditional love? I had it right here, in everything.
Love breathes its delicate essence into every little crack of this existence—even this storm. Divine love is not oceans away, but here, in the moment. If I’ve learned anything in my “studies,” it’s that all I have to do is breathe and love is alive within.
It turns out that the sacrifices I made weren’t preparing me for a darshan in Maui, but a journey inward, here at home.
You have helped to open up my heart and let the sunshine pour in. For that, I am so deeply grateful. But what I know now is it isn’t just you, it’s the hundreds of beings who have crossed my path—my parents, my children, my husband, my friends—who have helped crack me open and see love as it truly is.
Love itself is my great teacher. When we lean into her vastness, we are endlessly embraced.
Yesterday, I opened my copy of Be Here Now. The page I landed on discussed the bodhisattva’s role of helping others lift the veil. I recognize that I am just a small person in all this vastness, but I do have some skills and there’s no reason why I shouldn’t continue to dedicate my life to love and, maybe in the process, take some people with me on my cosmic trip.
I am a storyteller at heart. It seems I have the ability to alleviate suffering in myself and others through my words. This is where my work lies. So, I go forward, gently pushing my ego away, continuing to do my work on the inside so I can help on the outside. I have my own and others’ stories to share. I feel a book brewing up like a big, beautiful ol’ storm.
As much as I would love to hold your hand, smile into your eyes, and tell you I love you, I don’t think that’s in the cards. Just know this: the love that you send out leaps over oceans, it wiggles its way into people’s hearts, and reminds a multitude of seekers why we are here. So many people are out there shining with the light you and Maharaj-ji have shared. I can see it everywhere.
I look forward to crossing paths with you in many incarnations to come.
With the deepest love and gratitude,