During the 2009 financial crisis I was laid off from my corporate job.
I decided to take my passion for creativity and pursue it as a full-time career. Since then, I have created three designer jewelry brands, ran a beauty agency, and traveled between New York, Los Angeles, and Miami teaching and hosting mindfulness events.
From the sounds of it one would assume that I am successful, or that I am raking in the dough, but only part of that statement is true.
On the one hand, I consider myself successful because by definition success is described as having achieved popularity, profit, or distinction. However, although I have identified with two out of three of these accolades, I have definitely struggled with one.
For starters, I really wish that I was half as rich as everyone thought I was. I laugh when I say that because what most people don’t see hidden behind my Instagram feed, blogs, and smiling face is that for the past decade I have struggled financially. Truth is, I haven’t had much consistency with my income. Some months have been financially abundant and my business profitable—others not so much. Oftentimes it even feels like being in a bipolar relationship with my business because when the money is flowing, I am feeling secure and happy, but when the money isn’t flowing, I am anxious, worried, and in a state of fear—which I know has blocked my abundance and flow.
I now know that I made a grave mistake early on in my entrepreneurial foray and it’s that I, or rather my ego, wanted to do everything myself. I did not seek out investors for my business ventures, and instead I borrowed money from myself. I have since made amends with my ego, but the truth is I am currently sitting on a mini mountain of debt from my mistakes and paying ridiculous interest rates from my credit cards. And, on top of trying to dig myself out of debt, I have often worried, from one month to the next, how I’d pay my bills, which is not fun and actually quite stressful. But one day recently, I woke up and said: “I am sick of feeling this way!”—and, lo and behold, things miraculously began to change.
Elizabeth Gilbert says it best: “I’ve never seen any life transformation that didn’t begin with the person in question finally getting tired of their own bullshit.”—and, boy, is that true!
I don’t believe in coincidences and instead believe everything happens for a reason. So I trust that if you are reading this, you in some way resonate with what I am sharing and, together, we can to turn our lemons into a big juicy glass of lemonade—whether that be financial blockages, relationship blockages, lifestyle blockages, or any blockages.
I invite you to join me as we rewrite the script by trying these five simple tips that will help us remove these blockages, so we can finally attract all that’s rightfully ours for the taking!
First, we must believe that we can change any limiting beliefs into positive ones. For example, if we believe we can do something, oftentimes, and I would say nine out of ten times, or even 10 out of 10, we will do it. However, if we do not believe we can do something—we will not. Plain and simple.
Now, I invite you to grab a pen and paper and do a little exercise with me. On top of the paper write the words: Can I ________? Then, think of something to fill in the blank. Some examples may be: Can I exercise three days a week? Can I find love? Can I take that dream vacation? Now, fill in the blank to whatever it is you want to do, create, manifest, or achieve. If the answer is yes, you do believe that you can achieve whatever it is that you want! How neat is that?! However, if the answer is no, you may want to look deeper into the question and deeper into why not. This may stir up some stagnant emotional stuff because I do believe that many of our blockages are emotionally related, so I recommend being kind to yourself as you uncover and heal what may need to be healed for you to believe.
(In my case, I recently asked myself the question: Can I achieve consistent financial abundance? The answer was and is—yes.)
Next, I recommend saying affirmations that will help you align with your desires. By definition, an affirmation is an act of confirming something to be true. An example of affirmations can be: “I am attracting a GoldenDoodle puppy into my life.” You can speak, chant, or write your affirmations.
I am a firm believer in using the word “attracting” in my affirmations because attracting implies that something is coming forth. On the other hand, I would avoid using the words “want” or “need” when affirming because that implies that you are lacking, and lack attracts lack, similar in theory to how like attracts like.
I also would be cautious of using affirmations that use the word “I have.” I say this because I’ve read many self-help books, and several authors suggest affirming our future reality into existence. For example, if someone was single and looking for a relationship, I wouldn’t suggest using the affirmation: I have a loving partner. Instead, I would say: I am attracting a loving partner. I say this because it doesn’t feel right to act as if something is when it is not. It actually feels fraudulent and I don’t know about you, but I certainly don’t want to pretend to be something I am not. So, instead, switch the “have” to “attract” and watch the magic unfold.
(In my case, I used the affirmation: I am attracting consistent financial abundance!)
Now the fun, but the often sticky part, where we create a plan of action that will support our beliefs and affirmations.
I call this the R&D (research and development) stage.
For starters, I recommend using what we have and leaning on our network of family, friends, and community. An example of this could be picking up the phone and reaching out to a friend and sharing your desires with them—and in that conversation with them, you may just discover something about yourself or your idea. Or, you may want to branch out and attend a community event and set a goal to chat with one to three strangers and ask them about their goals and dreams. Again, you never know what you may get out of a conversation that may spark an idea or inspire you to look at things differently, plus you never know where the conversation may lead! There is so much power in human connection, let’s learn to use it.
Another way to create our desires into existence is to learn from experts in our field of interest. For example, if teaching yoga is a goal of yours, I recommend reading articles, books, and listening to podcasts on the subject. Also attending workshops or seminars from experienced teachers. Knowledge is power, and experience is the teacher of all things.
Another way to create is by doing. In my case, I sometimes take on jobs that I may not always want to do, but I do them because I am serious about attracting financial abundance and the Universe loves a stubborn heart! So, whatever it is that you want to attract, whether it be financial abundance, your life partner or a book deal—you’ve got to put in the work because the money is not going to show up at your front door, and neither is he or she or it. So although you may not want to hear it: get up and put yourself out in the world and create your reality.
And last, but certainly not least, to create we must also trust and surrender that all is unfolding exactly as it is supposed to.
(In my case, I am creating my financial abundance by using my network and branching out into new networks to build my business. I am also reading books and listening to podcasts from entrepreneurs who have achieved success in popularity, distinction, and profit—the triple threat! I am also taking on all the work gigs in my field that come my way because even if they aren’t exactly what I want to be doing, I know that every step I take is getting me closer and closer to the goals. And, last but not least, I am trusting that I am on the right path—and I know this because I feel it in my bones and I get pretty little signs from the Universe confirming so.)
4. Prove it.
Now we prove it to ourselves that our beliefs (#1), our affirmations (#2), and our ability to create (#3) are our foundational superpowers.
As Gabby Bernstein says, we are Super Attractors, and in this step, we get to prove it! How? We prove our beliefs, affirmations, and creations into existence by doing whatever needs to be done to achieve our goals and dreams. If we have to take a temporary job to get us closer to our financial goals, we do that. If we have to sign up for Bumble to get us closer to our life partner, we do it. If we want to write that manuscript, we start writing. We just gotta do it and prove to ourselves over and over and over again that we can.
I’ll share a little story with you. Throughout my career, one of my big goals was to get Five Star Hippie® into Bloomingdales. While I was working toward that goal I was doing trunk shows all over New York, Los Angeles, and Miami and oftentimes standing on my feet for hours on end. Sometimes I would make sales, and other times a goose egg, but I kept showing up weekend after weekend.
I started off doing these trunk shows at small mom-and-pop shops and yoga studios until eventually, national retailers were reaching out to me, asking to carry my jewelry collection in their chain of stores and studios.
Then, one day I decided to go after my Big Kahuna of a goal and sent a heartfelt email to Bloomingdales, and lo and behold they called me back and I started showcasing my jewelry collection in their New York stores.
Goal accomplished thanks to my beliefs, my affirmations, my ability to create, and then I proved it!
(In my case, I prove it by doing.)
After we do the work in stages one through four, now we must celebrate all our progress. Even the little steps. If you meet a new acquaintance, celebrate that. If you get a temporary work gig, celebrate that. If you read something that inspires you, celebrate that. If you swipe right and there’s a Boom, celebrate that. If you sell one of your products, celebrate that. And, if you find yourself smiling at all during the process, celebrate that, too.
How do you celebrate? Doing anything that makes you feel good. It can be doing something you love, like taking a yoga class, or a walk in nature, or buying a new book, or taking a bath, or meeting up with a friend, or drinking a glass of rosé, or getting an ice-cream cone. Whatever it is that makes you feel good, celebrate all the steps as you manifest your deepest desires.
(In my case, I celebrate by doing all the things I mentioned above.)
I vulnerably admit that I am still a work in progress, but I make it a point to practice what I preach and make sure to follow these five steps daily because I know that they work.
They’ve worked in other aspects of my life and they will work now as I attract financial abundance so I can support my lifestyle, pay down my debt, create an abundant savings account, donate more to charity, and go forth with my other dreams of opening a wellness center, traveling to Asia to study and deepen my mindful practices, write my book, get my masters, and raise a family that I see and feel in every part of my being.
I want to end with this: the reason I feel conformable writing and sharing on these topics is that I am this topic. I have lived, breathed, and experienced all that I am sharing here, and I have made the mistakes (that maybe you don’t need to). Also, I believe it’s better to take advice, or learn something from someone who has experienced what it is that many of us deal with, than from someone who hasn’t. For example, would you want to take business advice from someone who’s not in business? Likely not.
I am here for you and would love to support you. Now, let’s manifest our best lives!