I took out my Scrabble and spelled the word “worthless” with one “S.”
I put the letters back in and chose my own.
R. E. B. E. C. C. A.
I read it aloud and smiled.
“Good morning, Rebecca,” I said as I put my hand to my heart and poured my coffee. I looked out the window at the evergreen trees and thought about how important it was to me to be called by my real name.
It’s a beautiful name.
It’s always been my name, and now I can finally use it.
“What would you like to do today, Rebecca?” I asked myself.
I thought about it for a long time. The world is my oyster now, after all.
“Sip coffee while dancing Forrô in my wool socks,” I thought.
I turned on Falamansa and made a fried egg. I then held out my hands and pretended to grasp my partner’s. We swayed to the music while I closed my eyes and imagined the vibrant colors of Brazil.
Time passed, and my cheeks turned pink. I went outside to catch the breeze and looked up at the grey skies, embracing the uncertainty of the weather and the direction of my life.
When I returned, I took a hot shower and looked at my face in the mirror.
“Hi again, Rebecca,” I said with a smile.
I like my name.
It means beauty.
I wonder why I was given this name.
I looked at my eyes as tears ran down my face.
There was nobody to hold onto, so I held onto myself and whispered softly.
“You’re beautiful and worthy. Enjoy this life. You’re a warrior, Rebecca. The world is truly your oyster.”