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A post shared by Ineta Švedaitė | Illustrator (@femaleinspiring)

Realness we do not see in today’s world.

Our lives offline are so full of everything: family, work, parenting, friends, hobbies,  and more.  However, on social media, we can only share a small amount of our lives in these posts. This leads to many people seeing perhaps 10 percent of our lives, but feeling they know 100 percent. They think they understand who we are—they feel qualified to judge us.

This leads to us being summarised online by our visuals, and in turn, many people decide from this if we are good or bad, just by what we wear or do not wear. We, humans, are such visual creatures who tend to think we know someone by a look. What is even more interesting is we all hate to be judged and know it is wrong, but do it anyway because we are triggered, and many of us make the choice of hurt people hurting people instead of healing and working on ourselves.

This creates a separation in connection and shame on shame because we are not seen for all the other parts of who we are and what our life is—we are scared to share it.

So in the last month for me:

>> I have passed my B1 mündliche prüfung for my Swiss visa.
>> I have done my taxes and lost my tax form in the post, having to resend it to the tax office.
>> My mom has had cancer removed from her ear.
>> My daughter and I have both been sick.
>> I have started to find grace with a fingertip handstand.
>> I am studying to further educate myself in yoga and meditation.
>> My work has truly been too much and I am exhausted.
>> I am building a new course to share my teachings with the world, which has required a huge mind, body, soul, and financial investment.
>> I have been told by strangers on social media that I am disgusting as a human, and also that I am loved.
>> I have interviewed incredible humans like @tanyamarkul @ruthielindsey and am so grateful social media allowed us to connect.
>> I had one of my most unenjoyable birthdays and Mother’s Days.
>> I have experienced asthma to a level where I struggled to walk up stairs.
>> I had a friend take me away for a night as a belated birthday present which made me feel so loved.

I feel vulnerability is the key here for us all.

To share deeper messages in what we write, so we can connect and know that we are so much more than a look, a number and so are those we see.  I choose to share realness in my posts and words because it is healing, and also helps remind me in a world that forgets to see each other, I see me. I see me and own my experience. I am not those words. I am not the stories of those that project or the limiting beliefs of those spoken in this world.

People ask me why I bother to address people who do not understand others or judge. I realised my darkness was fed by those judgments and the antidote to my darkness and light was to share my truth and vulnerability. Now that I am a mother, I want to lead a life that is real so my daughter can, too.

I want to use my voice to make a difference for my daughter and others—by being vulnerable and real, by sharing my realness rather than my highlights or number-worthy posts.

I believe our capacity to live a life of love and joy in which we are accepted and respected for whoever and whatever we are, instead of one of fear and hatred in which we are judged and shamed, starts with us.