Does this sound familiar?
We want to make the change. Why? Because we’re worth it, of course.
We want to accept our imperfections. Why? Because we know they create the rich tapestry of our lives.
We want to move along the path toward mental stability. Why? Because we’re tired of feeling stuck, it’s time to change and fulfill our life paths.
We desperately want to disrupt old rigid thought patterns and behaviours. Why? Because internal freedom is essential, and creating internal freedom leads to external freedom.
Here are the old ways we handled this:
1. Sabotaging behaviours
Self-sabotage comes in many forms, but one thing for sure: this can be mental or physical—both are painful and require support. Issues that cause sabotaging behaviours vary from person to person. Looking outside of ourselves instead of inside means we lose focus on who we are. Listening to others too much means losing our power to their views, which weakens our ability to think for ourselves. When misused, social media doesn’t support our mindset, imparticular those who are sensitives or empaths. Therefore, keeping a tight reign on its consumption is vital.
This is just the way I am: starting to believe this is true, making excuses, even procrastinating; then losing faith in my abilities and stopping believing in my powers. I become complacent. I may even think that tomorrow something will change.
I know this feeling well, but it won’t change unless I take action.
First, I have to acknowledge that I want to make the change, and this acknowledgment has to come before I see the physical change happen.
2. Unhealthy relationships
Instability of the mind causes instability in all areas of life, including our relationships, whether that be our love lives, our families, or with our work colleagues.
When there is an imbalance in our relationships, it zaps our energy and time, creating an unhealthy mindset. Thus, causing perpetual emotions to rise. These emotions have a knock-on effect, affecting our bodies, health, and ultimately our lives.
Fatigue, listlessness, and weight fluctuations are all signs of a tired mind. Reaching for sugar, refined foods, alcohol, and drugs as a quick fix to get through the day only to feel an extreme drop in energy and mood.
3. Putting our needs aside
When the mind is unstable, it may cause us to put our needs aside so that everything we want for ourselves gets put on the back burner. Which means we stop taking care of ourselves. Suppose we are someone who runs after others before taking care of our own needs, who has no existing self-care regime. I’m not just talking about showering or putting on a bit of makeup. I’m talking about having our actual needs met. To love ourselves enough to care for ourselves.
When we learn to let go of these limiting beliefs, it’s then we can genuinely observe the change in our mental state.
Let’s look at new ways:
1. Knowing who we are
Start working from the inside out. Gain personal strength and begin to understand who we are—heightening confidence and consciousness. There is a more profound knowledge of ourselves and what we are willing to accept in our lives and whatnot. Our boundaries become apparent, and (we) We stop apologising for who we are.
2. Knowing we are better than this
Acknowledge the need for change and recognise that a future can be better than the life we’ve have been living. Take steps to get any needed support.
3. Healthy relationships
Are part of a balanced life. When our relationships are healthy, then how much healthier we feel. It brings lightness to every aspect of our day. We feel good, and feeling good is what life is all about. Co-creating with others allows for new ideas and interactions to blossom. From this place, beautiful creations and connections can grow.
4. Healthy lifestyle
Balancing the mind balances the body; we have more energy, look better, and feel happier. We finally have the spring in our step that we have seen in others.
5. Honouring our needs
Lots of self-love, self-care, admiration for ourselves, and our goals and achievements make for a happier, steady, and stable us.
We may be thinking, “I’ll never do all this; these are such big steps.” So, let’s shift these beliefs and develop them by consistent strength and persistence. Making change takes initial steps.
6. Taking self-responsibility
Acknowledging the need for change. If we don’t take responsibility or honour our need for change, we continue on the same hamster wheel. Repeatedly spinning in the same direction, going nowhere. Yes, it can be scary to acknowledge, but a little fear can put us in the right direction. Pushing through that terror barrier of change is the most challenging part; once we do it, everything from that moment on gets so much easier.
We start by honouring our greatness, wonderfulness, and inner strengths by looking deeper into what these aspects of us look like. These positive, individual aspects have to become the focus when setting up a daily practice.
7. Daily practice
This is one thing I have done since I can’t remember and was the most significant change breaker in my own transformation. Daily practice is specific to each of us, and it can be confusing where to start. There is so much information out there. I have known people to give up trying for this exact reason.
However, creative actions that change our mindsets bring us freedom. Using specific meditations, affirmations, and mantras can bring space to your mind. Freeing us from unwanted thought patterns. Supplying us with energy on all levels to move forward as you begin to see our lives from a different and much more valuable perspective.
Note: a daily practice has to be something you enjoy; otherwise, it is what’s the point. This may include dance, other forms of movement, singing. The creative list is endless as long as you can create a focus of mind and you eventually start noticing the internal benefits. Keep a journal to help mark your progress. Then you can look back on how far you have come.
8. Creating actionable goals
Help create clarity and a focused future. Once again, this prevents us from spinning round in circles and achieving little. Using the word goal can often sound a little daunting. For years I have worked with people who have rarely considered big goals in their life, if ever at all. They may have been lost in fear along the way due to negative paradigms and self-sabotaging behaviours. I have also seen these people get out of their own way, expect, and achieve great things.
Know you are worthy, and you deserve the best. This is how to think from now on. Small steps are vital for more considerable achievements, which give us the strength and confidence to keep going.
Understanding the power of nature, how the seasons affect our goals, and how we can clearly plan for the future. Working with seasonal influences is a natural, harmonious, and balanced way of being that suits our lives from a fundamental level. It’s a creative way to move forward and be it is one of my favourite ways of goal setting.
9. Finding the balance of mind
Balance is so important, especially when working with the mindset. It can be easy to forget just how far we have come.
Suppose you’re not used to doing regular self-check-ins. This is a wonderfully self-validating habit to get into. In the beginning, it takes someone else to shine the light back at you—but as it starts to feel good and can’t be without it. Begin to notice when the balance isn’t there and create space for all the things you love to do, no matter how wild and crazy (as long as they cause no harm to yourself or others.)
Start to recognise the light in your eyes. Your true nature will begin to shine through.
10. Yoga for balance
When we balance the mind in yoga, we balance the body and spirit and all the other aspects of our life begin to fall into place. Yoga isn’t just asana. To have an authentic yoga practice, we need to experience its fullness. That’s yoga in balance; the word yoga itself means to join together, so then and only then can we start to bring true yoga into our work, rest, and play.
11. Letting go of perfection
This is a big lesson. When we allow our minds to rule, being “perfect” can take over. As a result, we may get little done because we always want everything to be perfect. It can put a lot of strain on the mind, body, and spirit. Wanting to be perfect can affect our day-to-day life significantly. It drains our energy, causing us to be less productive.
Being less perfect can allow us to achieve our goals and feel confident along the way until we reach our dreams. Then, we can make the shift by deeply acknowledging our own self-worth.
Perfectionism is another form of procrastination. Simply put, it’s a barrier that holds us back from getting anything done.
“You are always one decision away from a totally different life.” ~ anonymous
It’s true—it’s always up to us whether we choose to make that decision or not. It takes faith and trust and requires us to ignore any fears and make that leap into developing the shifts.
Making the shift may feel alien, but remember all the old behaviours brought about through conditioning from others take daily work to release. Then consequently, realigning with who we are takes patience. Know and trust your beliefs.
It will be worth our while.