Truth: The quality or state of being true.

 

There was once a girl, who thought people would abandon her if she wasn’t like the others.

So, she straightened her hair, and starved herself skinny, and wore clothes that were too tight, and slept with people who didn’t love her. and drank and drugged her way through college. The more she tried to curb the hunger for acceptance and truth, the emptier she felt.

 

Her tower fell hard when she tried to fit in with the greedy crowd. Her freedom was taken. Her rights revoked. Her clothes and dignity were stripped. And searched.

 

She was raped; repeatedly, by guards. Locked in a cell for hours upon hours and she spun around with letters from the love of her life telling her he no longer loved her either. She was isolated. Alone. Abandoned. She was betrayed by people and places and things. And her hunger pains became too much of a burden to carry. She considered her options. To end it all or the stay with it. To begin the fight or find the white flag.

 

And then the voice came. At first, it was quiet. Very quiet. Whispers.

 

“Seek within”

 

It grew louder.

 

“Seek WITHIN”

 

And then the hunger and the voice became too much to bear. Her ears, her stomach, and her heart ached. She tried to run but she was in prison. Hardly any room to move. She tried to speak but her voice and her spirit had been dimmed so intensely that she couldn’t make a sound.

 

It was time.

 

She ate. And then she devoured her food. And books. Until all the crumbs were gone. So, she had to find more things to nourish her. To bring her back to her truth. To fill her with that light she knew existed so very deep inside of her, More books. And movement. And salt water that shook her to her core. She danced, even in the darkness. She chopped all of her hair off and put it in the mail. She moved more. And more. And more. Her breath was heavy, but her heart grew lighter. She was terrified. She observed the darkness, she continued the fight. She began to find love again, only this time it came from the depths of her very soul. She fell in love with the cell and the isolation and the darkness.

 

She began to notice a shift.

 

One battle down. First brick of the tower restored. But there was so much work to do. The hustle came.

 

She fought the guards as they continued to violate her. She helped a murderer recover from a seizure. She testified and told the truth. She admitted guilt. She found the true meaning of remorse and redemption. She counted the days until she could emerge from the ashes, She found friendship in the most obscure place. She kept fighting. She pummeled on. She knew that her love had emerged and her light grew brighter and brighter.

 

She had found her truth. And it defined itself as resilience. Authenticity. Loving people just as they are. Helping them. Loving herself, without hair, without clothes, without rights or freedom or control. She loved herself stripped of literally everything. Naked. Alone. Abandoned. Betrayed. She loved herself ferociously. Raw, unhinged love. Even for the criminal she was. Even for the whore she had been. Even in the dark and the light and the blood and the pain. She was completely vulnerable.

Dead but alive.

Educated but naive.

Stronger than any other person on this planet, yet soft.

Authentic.

Brave.

Apprehensive.

Floating around in a state of being.

Sick but recovering.

 

Counting the days until the calendar ran out.

 

And then it happened.

 

The cage was unlocked,

Her wings had grown back

 

Life sat on the tips of her fingertips.

 

And in her truth, she flew.

 

And in her truth, she flew.