Being human is an amazing experience that you and I are lucky to be a part of.
The sweet sides of life can feel like absolute bliss. Falling in love, traveling to faraway places, eating delicious food, and accomplishing goals are just some of the things that make us feel like we’ve won the lottery.
These good feelings and emotions, the ones that feel like a warm blanket, are the things that make us want to live forever. To keep chasing those experiences and people that make us happy.
If there was a way to stop time and live in a moment forever, those would be the ones we’d choose.
It’s in times like those where I feel like the luckiest woman alive. The days when I feel on top of the world, like life is unfolding perfectly, make it all worth it.
But what about the flip side?
What about the opposite of the warm-feeling emotions, the ones that feel unbelievable heavy? Those tough feelings that make you question everything and wonder what the whole point of this is? Feelings like loneliness, heartbreak, confusion, and sadness.
Unfortunately, I think a lot of us have probably felt these more than we’ve wanted in the last two and a half years. Life certainly has felt heavy and uncertain as of late for us humans. These feelings are what made me share my writing, to let everyone know they aren’t alone and there is way to process our pain rather than hide it away.
Recently, I have been feeling these heavy emotions and I couldn’t seem to shake them. Although I am a firm believer in embracing all emotions and feelings that come up, I just couldn’t find a way through.
This past year was one of the most intense of my life. Since last August, my husband and I have been thrown for a loop. It started with getting married in a hospital, moving houses twice, multiple job changes, starting life in a brand new state knowing no one, putting my writing and coaching out into the world, and so much more.
While a lot of these things were exciting, I still felt that unsettled feeling of loneliness and confusion. Starting over in a new place is never easy, especially during a worldwide pandemic and no longer having the office to socialize. While I wouldn’t change any of the past year, my soul still had to catch up to all the new chapters starting.
Now, I have been down this path before. Seven years ago I moved to new city, not knowing a soul. My first time in that city was when I stepped off the plane. My soul was pushing me here, although at the time it felt painful.
I was sad, angry, confused, and lonely. Why did I decide to start a brand new life when staying in my comfort zone felt so much lighter and easier? That first year was especially hard as I was navigating my way through forming new connections and attempting to plant roots.
There were so many times in that first year that I wanted to throw in the towel and move closer to friends and family. My stomach dropped every time I saw my friends hanging out together, going on trips, and making memories as I sat in my studio apartment alone.
But that year was also when I dove head-first into self-development. I wanted to learn about myself and not be held back by the anxiety that followed me my entire life. I knew I was called to this place for a reason but I wouldn’t realize it until much later.
During a particular painful night where the loneliness felt unbearable, I came across an eight-word sentence that changed everything for me. It seemed so simple but it helped put everything I was feeling into a new perspective. It gave me a feeling of comfort for the first time in forever.
And it’s one that I came back to recently when those tough emotions flooded back in. Instead of running and hiding from them, I am embracing them with everything I have.
This sentence is helping me yet again ride the wave that is life:
You are exactly where you need to be.
Read it over and over until it sinks in. Read it as many times as you need until you feel that wave of comfort come over you.
Because the fact is, we are exactly where we need to be. See nothing in life is a coincidence or fluke. If you look back on your life, can you start to see patterns? Can you see why big changes or pivotal moments had to happen to lead you to your current reality?
And even though life may feel tough right now, or you worry you’ll never get out of the tough part, I promise you are where you need to be. You are learning the lessons that are going to catapult you into your next chapter. You are meeting the people who may be with you forever or just a couple of months. They will turn into your greatest teachers.
That loneliness you feel is there to show you the depths of your heart and soul. It’s there to remind you you are human. It’s there to push you to reaching out to someone new or finally going after that love you so desire.
This sentence has saved me over and over again. It reminds me that nothing is ever permanent and I can handle anything that comes my way. I am built for big emotions, good and bad, and I will be stronger because of it.
Your life will look different a year from now, even six months from now. So why not fully embrace what this season is teaching you? Take a bird’s eye view of your life path and see that it’s part of something bigger. You got through tough emotions and events in the past, you can handle what’s happening to you now.
So next time life feels too heavy or you can’t seem to shake those nagging feelings, put your hand on your heart and remind yourself that you are exactly where you need to be.
You can handle anything that comes your way. You will be happy and experience the sweetness of life again soon. You’ll look back and be thankful for the stage you are in now.
Experience now to the fullest because you will never get this moment back.
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