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October 29, 2022

You are not good enough: And other lies we tell ourselves

Photo by MART PRODUCTION on Pexels.

As women, why do we tell ourselves that we aren’t good enough? That we aren’t pretty enough? That we aren’t skinny enough?   We criticize ourselves daily, if only my cheeks were a bit higher and my eyes were a different color. If my lips were fuller and my nose was a bit smaller. If my face wasn’t so round or so narrow. Then I would be pretty enough. Maybe if I wore a size 2 instead of a 4, a size 6 instead of an 8, an 8 instead of a 10. Maybe If my laugh wasn’t so loud, If I was smarter, if i was more outgoing, if I was more successful, if I kept a better house, if I spent more time with my family. Maybe if… if… if…  So who decides this about us?  We do.  We decide this. Every. SIngle. Day. We make the choice to say these things to ourselves. We look in the mirror every day and tell ourselves we aren’t good enough. We convince ourselves that all of these things we say about ourselves are true.
Why do we put this pressure on ourselves? The people who love us don’t care what size we wear or whether our eyes are blue, green, brown or hazel. They only see this person that they love to be around.  That they chosen to be in their lives. They only see the way our eyes light up when our favorite song comes on the radio and the way they soften when we talk about the person we are in love with. They love the way we laugh so loud when they tell us a funny story. They love that we sing out loud to the radio even though we can’t carry a tune. They don’t care if we wear a size 12 a size 10 or a size 2. They only see how that beautiful dress we have on brings out the color in our eyes. If only we could see ourselves the way that those who love us see us. If only we weren’t so hard on ourselves all of the time. If only we didn’t tell ourselves that we aren’t pretty enough, good enough, smart enough and if we could love ourselves the same way other people love us.
It is time to start looking in the mirror every single day and to take 1 minute to see ourselves as others see us. Look hard at that beautiful women staring back at us and see her beautiful smile. See the women whose eyes light up when she is happy. Who laughs loudly because she enjoys a funny story and is having a great time hearing it. The women who is kind and loyal and loves with all her heart and with every part of herself. The women who has been strong her entire life even when she thought she was going to fall apart. The women who has smiled through her tears at times. Who has lived for others and is finally living for herself. Why would you want to change her in any way? You are good enough! I am good enough! In fact we are better than good enough, we are fabulous in every single way.  The reason being, you are YOU and there is not another person like you and that is why people love you. If anyone ever makes you feel like you aren’t good enough or tells you that you aren’t good enough, they must be looking in the wrong mirror. Becasue that is not the person staring back at us. We would never be critical of our friends that way we are to ourselves. So it’s time to start loving ourselves the same way we love other people. And see the beauty that is us.

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