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I got up and went for a walk today.
I went to all your favorite places, but you weren’t there.
It’s as if nobody ever knew you. Maybe you didn’t exist. Maybe you were just a part of my fantasy.
I wondered, if I grabbed your favorite drink, could I remember your face then?
I asked the barista to pour me a hot vanilla latte and sweeten it with honey, just the way you like it. I sat down and felt the crisp air brush the hair away from my face.
Autumn is here—are you coming home soon?
I pulled your favorite book out of my bag and started reading it again from the beginning, taking note of your highlighted pages and wondering what you were thinking when you marked those specific sentences. It made me smile.
This was truly a good book. I could almost see you sitting in your favorite corner of the house, all wrapped up in blankets asking me to make you some coffee but not wanting to get out of your chair.
You’d finally get up and sigh as you put your book down and start on coffee and cookies. We never ran out of cookies. I love that about you—always paying close attention to detail.
Always knowing how to take care of me best.
Will I ever see you again? I sure hope so…I miss you. We have so much more to do together. I don’t know when you left—I didn’t realize that something was wrong. I feel like little by little I stopped hearing your voice and was only able to hear my own.
Who am I though? If not you.
You’re the part of me which the sun shines through. You’re the part of me that creates rainbows and magic in the kitchen. You’re the part of me I can’t live without.
You are me. I am you. We are the yin and yang in this dance of life that we chose.
The cloudy days are gone, and you need to come back to bring the sunshine with your smile. As I stare in the mirror, I can sometimes catch a glimpse of you, and it gives me hope. It feels like home. It tells me you’re still there. Maybe a little shy, maybe a little deep inside me—but you’re there. You never left.
I just couldn’t find you for a little while, so I went on a journey to bring you back. I promise you we’ll read all your favorite books and laugh until our belly bursts with all your favorite movies. I’ll take you to the park and nurture every part of your soul. Don’t be gone for long; I feel so lost without you.
Some days we are unstoppable, and other days it’s hard to get out of bed. That’s okay though. I’ll always be here to take care of you, and on the days when you can’t be sunshine and rainbows, we will be cloudy skies and rain.
I’ll always love you deeply for I am you and you are me.