She’s the one who will drive you mad when you have her.
She will make you question every ounce of her sanity—and your own. Her with her unpredictable ways, she is anything but average. She is wild and she is free. Her contagious smile and carefree ways will quickly nestle their way into your heart. You will be intoxicated with her and you will inevitably find yourself falling hard and fast—they always do.
Until the day the newness fades, and the thoughts begin to creep. You start to question if you want this anymore. You think that maybe you couldn’t handle this forever. You become tempted by the thoughts of someone less complicated, more put together, someone who just isn’t her.
All those things you wish you could change about her—I hate to break it to you, but those are the things you will miss once you set her free. Her inability to pick a restaurant, her anti-routine, routine. Her disheveled way of just being. Her inability to be anywhere on time because she always wanted to look her best, and was too much of an optimist to account for traffic. Listening to her stories, wondering how the hell one person managed so many shenanigans, or to her rambling on and on about the book she’s reading or the story she’s writing.
You see, it will always be the unpredictable girls that you won’t easily forget. The dreamers, the artists, the lovers. The ones who dance into your snow globe of a world and make it snow like crazy while they’re present. The women who make you question yourself—as she sure as hell isn’t afraid to question you. Those women who have no fear of being themselves, and no sense of obligation to change for anyone. Those contagious women who have the confidence to just be.
Yet somewhere down the line you decided she was too much to handle. A spitfire. A handful. Flaky. Unpredictable. Maybe you only saw her for her weaknesses and looked over all that she had to offer. You failed to see that she’s a spitfire because she’s passionate. She’s a handful because she’s strong as hell. She could be flaky because she gets caught up—in her writings, drawings, music.
You knew this before you had her. Her eccentricities were what drew you in. You wanted something different, but forgot to ask yourself if you could handle it.
Could you handle the unconventionality that riddles her being? Were you strong enough to stand by a woman whose carefree spirit lit up the darkest of rooms? Were you ready for the spur-of-the-moment kind of love she was so eager to share? Were you adventurous enough to keep up with her wandering soul? Were you really ready for a woman like that?
Before you stole her beautiful, wild heart you swore you’d never be like the ones who came before you. The ones who called her “too much“—too irresponsible, too forgetful, too unpredictable. The ones who criticized her because she refused to grow up. She never compromised herself to make them comfortable, and they always hated that. She was who she was, and that was that. You told her these were the things you loved, until those things became part of your routine and you found yourself blinded to what was in front of you.
Being “too much” was never what caused her heart to break, it was falling for those who were not enough.
Being with a woman whose light shines so brightly takes a special kind of person. One who is strong, patient, and loving. Someone who isn’t intimidated by her, feeling no need to dim her light to feel better about their own. Her memories will never be the kind you can hide away in a box. Instead her memories will lie in your heart—and in the way she made you feel. The way she introduced you to new things, new places, new experiences. The way being with her was anything but mundane. Won’t you miss the way she could always make you laugh no matter the circumstance? The late nights talking about aliens, heartbreak, and war.
She’s nothing like the other girls, you said so yourself, but did you remember to ask yourself—are you ready to handle a woman like that?
~
Relephant:
When a Wild Woman Finds her Warrior, Everything Changes.
Author: Emily Cutshaw
Image: Unsplash
Editor: Jen Schwartz
Copy Editor: Nicole Cameron
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