My friend text me the other day and asked, “How did you know you were ready to fully love and trust your boyfriend?” This question took me by surprise for a couple of reasons. One, I was shocked that my friend was finally allowing herself to open up in a new relationship. Two, I never really thought about that in-depth before. 

About a year and a half ago, I met a really great guy and it scared me to death. I was scared that it was too good to be true — it felt almost like a mirage. It felt like the universe was dangling a great man in my face, just to snatch it away. However, at some point, I jumped in both feet first. I acknowledged that for once, I was truly happy. I stopped second-guessing every little thing, and I did one of the scariest things ever, I fully loved someone. 

To answer my friend’s question, I had to reflect. I realized that it wasn’t just in one moment that I knew he was the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, it was several mini moments. It was when he came to my house and cooked dinner at midnight because I got off work at 11:30, but he got off at 5:00. It was when he prayed for me and told me I didn’t have to fight my battles alone anymore. It was when he moved me into his apartment after my lease was up, and I didn’t know where to go next. It was when my mom lost her job, and he said “We’ll make sure she is okay.” 

There were several little moments that showed me, no matter what, he was going to do everything in his power to take care of me. Whether it be emotionally, financially, or physically as long as he was of sound mind and body, he would take care of me. This is what I told my friend — in so many words. 

A lot of times people say when you know, you know. I believe there is some truth to this, and as women especially, you should trust your gut. It rarely, if ever, lies. Modern-day women are stepping up to the plate and taking charge of their love lives, and sealing the deal for “the one”. In fact, nearly 61% of men in the U.S. say they wouldn’t mind being proposed to. Now, I’m a bit too traditional for this, but I am all for going for what you want as a woman. 

As women, we’re often told to guard our hearts — and we should — but we also have to love fearlessly. Long story short, you know he’s the one when he makes sacrifices for you, puts you first, honors you, trusts you, hears you — and my favorite — feeds you. That last one may be for giggles, but when you know, you know. 

Good luck out there, and remember, love fearlessly or not at all.