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Make the Time

People often ask me, “How do you find the time to take care of yourself? I don’t even have the time to sit. I am so busy with the kids, sports, work, and life.”

My answer is simple: I make time.

I believe strongly that you cannot pour from an empty cup…and so many of us do.

If you take a little peek at society today, we are constantly on our phones, social media, we binge-watch TV shows, we rush, rush, rush. We are often miserable, fighting against ourselves to get this done and that done. We are tired, over-caffeinated, numbed by substances, and we all seem to think that our emergency constitutes an emergency for others.

I often hear, “I used to paint, write, walk, run, go to the gym, eat well, take photos, hike…but I don’t anymore, I don’t have time. Because of work, life, kids, sports, everything I need to do for others.”

Perhaps someone told us that we don’t matter when we have kids.

Perhaps someone told us that we don’t matter because work is more important.

Perhaps someone told us that we are only as successful as the house we own and the cars we drive.

Oh, wait, someone did: society.

Society is so reward-seeking nowadays. But society today is also…miserable.

Life’s rewards are not monetary, but a lot of us believe they are. The moments we feel truly happy and peaceful are generally when we are “doing” the things that we love the most:

A walk with friends.

Tea with your best friend.

A conversation or connection with another human being.

Intimate relations with your loved one.

A hug.

A kiss.

Listening to music really loud, and singing your heart out while you drive.

Exploring with your child(ren).

Laughing, loving, being.

The simplicity of life.

That is when we are the happiest, but we have forgotten this. We are constantly comparing ourselves to others and trying to compete with them. We want, want, want, and are not grateful for all that we do have. We play judge and jury with people and all things. We expect more, better—nothing is ever enough. We get one reward, only to already be planning the next one.

We have no connection to ourselves—our passions.

So many of us don’t even know how to sit in the stillness and just be.

There are a million reasons why you don’t have time to do that thing you love, but truthfully, they are all just an excuse.

Wake up earlier—it feels refreshing anyway to awaken with the birds.

Turn off the TV.

Take a nap, fall asleep embraced in all that you are.

Put down your phone—none of the people on your social media are in the room with you anyway.

Go for a walk—hold your child’s hand.

Look at the big, beautiful world we live in—there is a connection you are missing for sure.

But it’s simple.

It’s just you.

What do you love? What makes your heart sing? What passion have you forgotten about? What have you pushed to the side? What makes you smile?

Take five minutes to start.

Commit to five minutes a day, to do something for yourself.

There is no reason why you can’t have five minutes out of 24 hours—even if that means sitting on the laundry room floor in a pile of clothes, with a journal, or a chocolate bar.

It takes only one breath to connect back with yourself—so sit and take eight deep breaths.

Stare at the wall.

Daydream.

Or get up and go outside.

Garden.

Paint.

Write.

Cook.

Do whatever makes you happy.

Just breathe.

The only person you are guaranteed to take with you to the end is you—so you may as well love yourself enough to do something, one thing, anything, to honor all that you are.

You don’t have to put your simple pleasures on hold for everyone else. Not even your kids can be used as an excuse—there is no excuse because you can take a few minutes and love yourself. You’re still a good parent; in fact, you will be a better one. You don’t have to make a million reasons why you can’t, won’t, shouldn’t.

You mattered before you had kids, sports, work—you still matter.

I promise something profound happens when you take time for yourself.

You will recognize a piece that has been missing, that you have been chasing in rewards outside of yourself.

You will realize all you ever really wanted and needed, all the answers you have been seeking and chasing, is you.

Your connection to others.

Your children.

Your loved ones.

You and all those things you cherish.

The simplicity of life.

And life is really beautiful when you find the time to see all that you are and all that you are blessed with.

Eyes to see.

Ears to hear.

A heart so full of love.

My goodness, all the beauty in your world starts with you.

So take the time, find what you love, find yourself.

And then honor those simple joys.

Your whole world and your perception of it will change.

It is not selfish—it’s beautiful.

Make time for yourself because—it’s just five minutes.

What is the worst that could happen if you allowed yourself to have just five minutes?

I love you,

Keep smiling.

PS: Hey, weird thought, what if you taught yourself to love the simple joys, to follow your heart, and honor your passions, embrace who you are; to love yourself? And then, taught your child(ren) to do the same? Life-, no wait, world-changing…

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