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It’s nearly impossible to give a failproof checklist for a “healthy relationship.”

And that’s because love is never black-and-white. It doesn’t color within the lines—or behave like the words we so badly want to define it with. It scribbles out of us in splashes of color and emotion and chaos.

It’s not some bright star we can paint onto a canvas—transfix into one spot—and say, “This is what love looks like.”

Nope.

When it’s real love, it’s a living, burning thing. It’s never how we draw it up in our minds.

Sometimes, even after we find it, we have to readjust our gaze to figure it all out again: we don’t just find love and stay in love simply because we’ve found it or checked enough boxes off the “if he/she does X, Y, and Z, then they’re a keeper” list.

Love is easy. And so damn hard.

We have to feed it; we have to nurture it; we have to choose it—every. single. day.

“Are you finding your way in the dating world? You may just have a list in the back of your mind of the top dealbreakers for your ideal relationship. But, while dealbreakers are what many tend to notice, what about the dealmakers? Sometimes, it’s good to focus on what can make your date a potential partner. The dealmakers.” ~ Psych2Go

There is no manual on “how to do love right,” but according to the video below, there are some non-negotiables for the relationship to have a chance:

1. Good communication

2. Emotionally supportive

3. They are diligent about your safety

4. Willingness to work on the relationship

5. A great sense of humor

6. Being able to admit when they’re wrong

7. Someone who is willing to grow together and adapt

(When I first saw the list, I thought, “Umm, honesty is totes missing.” But I’ve decided that falls under the communication category.)

May it be of benefit: