The day I left
I told you

That I had spent the last few years trying to lock you down

I wanted you to be mine
To spend a lifetime walking with you and me
side by side
To be deeply enamored with the world
With you and only you

And now as our paths
Vanishing off into separate horizons
I find myself looking over my shoulder
Bittersweet

Wishing you’d said

yes

I will take the journey with you

yes

I will take your hand

yes

I will be there for the next adventure

I know you had your reasons

Just as I had mine

But today and now, I mourn the future that never got to be

We came so close
You and I

Together we thrashed and suffered
Struggled and strived until

Somehow we sanded away our rough corners and edges
Til the only thing that lay between us
was love

And somehow

That still wasn’t enough

I will miss the way you snuggled into me
The way you love so deeply
The charming way you turned everything into play
The way you let my care and affection
Impact you to your core

In the beginning,
You asked me
If I thought I’d be able to find another person like you
and I naively said

yes

It’s clear to me today
The answer was

no

It was always no

There will never be another you
There will never be someone who can take your place
There will never be another us

I’m learning that different partners aren’t ever better
They’re just different

I’m learning there is no replacement for what we had
And as the tears begin to fall again
I feel the sadness, truth, and bittersweet joy in that

We had our perfect, chaotic, messy, beautiful moments in time
And they are

perfectly irreplaceable

And maybe that transience is what makes it beautiful

Or maybe
That’s just me

Trying to convince myself

That maybe
This isn’t all loss

That maybe I am not losing an entire lifetime
and an entire universe with you at its center

I wish I had more to say
One last beautiful thing
To weave into this tapestry of us

Because if I had just one more thing to say

Maybe it wouldn’t have to end
Maybe we could be together

For just a few more scraps of time

I love you

And goodbye
I love you

Perhaps one day
We’ll meet again

in the Flow

~

Please consider Boosting our authors’ articles in their first week to help them win Elephant’s Ecosystem so they can get paid and write more.