When I was a little girl, I chased after butterflies and lightning bugs.

Sometimes I caught them, and sometimes I didn’t.

Little did I know, back then, that some things are not meant to be caught. No matter how badly we may want them, not all things are meant to be held.

I spent a great deal of time in my early 20s chasing after men who didn’t want me. I broke my own heart running after these fools. In my mind, it was a game, and I wanted to play. But it wasn’t a game of hide and seek.

Many years later, I learned that none of those men were worth one second of my time. It turns out they were playing a different kind of game—one I wished I had never learned about.

After getting engaged in my mid-20s, my best friend ghosted me. I couldn’t understand why this person would just drop me, out of the blue. My head was spinning and my heart was hurting. I spent weeks and weeks trying to get in touch with her.

After many failed attempts, a letter finally arrived in the mail. She had “broken up” with me because we were at different places in our lives. She was still single and loving that life, and I was settling down and starting a family.

Yet again, it wasn’t me—it was her.

What I figured out pretty recently was that all those times I was chasing, I was chasing the wrong things (and people). I was chasing things that were not meant for me. No matter how hard I chased, they would never be mine.

What I should have been chasing were things that would be better for my heart, mind, and soul. I should have been chasing after a better job, inner peace, greater physical and mental health, my dreams and passions.

If it’s not going to improve my life, you won’t find me running after it. Not anymore.

Ask yourself these important questions:

What is it that you want the most? 

What will bring the most joy to your life? 

Once you’ve figured out that part, go chase those things. And don’t stop until you get them. Not every thing or every person is meant to stay in your life. But the most important ones are worth chasing after.

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