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July 3, 2023

Orgasms Stole My Pleasure

Seems counterintuitive right?! Orgasms are pleasurable so how would having orgasms lead me to becoming detached from the essence of my pleasure?!

It all began when I met my husband. The first man I ever experienced an orgasm with at the age of 19. (Sorry mum & dad if you just discovered I was having sex before marriage)

What an eye opening experience that was. To feel my body come alive from tip to toe and know that the elusive female orgasm was real and it was AMAZING!!

According to my group of friends however , I had happened upon something they were struggling to experience for themselves and I was incredibly lucky.

Great! I thought. I am lucky.  Not just to have experienced an orgasm with my partner , but to orgasm every time we had sex and multiple orgasms as well.

It felt like I had stumbled across the holy grail of orgasmic partnership. And I wasn’t gonna give it up.

Fast forward 7yrs and we were married, another 6yrs and we had 3 beautiful children …. another 5yrs and we began to crack.





I knew I wasn’t happy. I knew bold action was required but I was scared …. Scared I would never meet another man I would reach orgasm with. It was enough to keep me where I was, I didn’t want to give up orgasming with a partner for the rest of my life, surely that would be breaking some kind of sex rule?!

Thankfully, Amy Towel from “Temple of She” came into my life and it so happened I won a spot on her 12 week “enter the temple” pleasure mentorship program.

For 12 weeks, over and over again, I met myself in my desires and was encouraged to own them / share them / claim them openly.

In doing so I awakened to the realisation that pleasure is so much more then sex and orgasm. It’s trust , safety and curiosity wrapped within a bubble of sensory deliciousness and radiant joy. It’s knowing yourself as a being designed for pleasure and play and not accepting anything less then your deepest desires.

The 12 week temple immersion changed my life and became a catalyst for my shift in working professional in the somatic and sensuality space as an erotic maven and Yoni massage practitioner.

As I opened to my desires I found the courage to chase what lit me up. To leave situations that were void of trust and safety and lean into one’s that were.

My self-pleasure upleveled from the basics of masturbation to full enjoyment of self-honouring …. And discovering in the most trusted situations with myself , I actually experience squirting (hello new fun)

And I’ve also discovered, that my orgasms are MINE. I can (and do) let go and reach the most amazing highs of pleasure with new partners when I desire too. If I can be met with trust , safety & compassionate curiosity I return serve with complete surrender and pure ecstasy.

Xx Jo

Want to connect with Amy Towel for future Temple

immersions?! Find her on socials here:

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