*Elephant is not your doctor or hospital. Our lawyers would say “this website is not designed to, and should not be construed to provide medical advice, professional diagnosis, opinion, or treatment to you or any other individual, and is not intended as a substitute for medical or professional care and treatment. Always consult a health professional before trying out new home therapies or changing your diet.” But we can’t afford lawyers, and you knew all that. ~ Ed.

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People who are in pain should be able to tell their mental health provider when they are feeling suicidal instead of being judged as “manipulative.”

We encourage people to call the hotline or talk to a therapist, but the truth is, saying you’re suicidal might sometimes send you on a path you don’t want to walk down.

We need to change the field.

It starts with realizing the systems that have harmed people and the effect abusive and neglectful proximal processes have on shaping an individual.

I don’t think Durkheim would say the cause of someone’s suicide or suicidal ideation is “manipulation.”

I don’t think we should be seeing in this way either.

Some people really are in pain, and labeling them with a personality disorder, as if their pain is inherent in who they are, is not okay.

I’ve never met someone who was suicidal who wasn’t hurting.

We need more IFS therapists.

We need more trauma-informed therapists who understand Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs).

We need developmental psychologists to hold hands with mental health providers and find a better solution to suicidal feelings that aren’t ignoring people’s pain or seeing them through a behaviorist DBT approach, in my opinion.

Trauma is not just what happened to you.

It’s also what didn’t, and I’ve never met someone given the label of BPD who feels suicidal who didn’t have some serious childhood trauma.

If you’re someone with childhood trauma and are feeling suicidal, find a therapist trained in Internal Family Systems (IFS). I think all of us who have felt this way and sought out a trauma-informed IFS practitioner can vouch for the non-pathologizing, loving support you are likely to receive.

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