The festive season raises my anxieties. I’m not going to lie. It’s a tough time for me personally and I persevere through it every year.

First is the anniversary of my brother’s untimely passing on 19 December. A date that also subsequently became the birthday of my eldest daughter. Spiritual teachings suggest that a birth around the time of a prior death is a gift to help change our perception of that date. I believe it. But I still succumb to intense emotion.

Second is my husband’s birthday on 23 December. It’s a milestone worth pausing for. But it adds to an overwhelming week.

Third is Christmas on 25 December. It is a joyous date and I am filled with gratitude. But by nightfall I am transitioning into the werewolf from Michael Jackson’s Thriller Night.

I have yet to fully master the end-of-year overwhelm. But for what it’s worth, here are six tips that I practice each year to help overcome the Christmas overwhelm. I call them the six D’s:

1. Downshift. If you can afford to, take time off before Christmas. Use the time to prepare for the holidays without the added pressure of a day job. Take time to nurture yourself. Calm your mind. Slow your energy. Rediscover your playfulness and joy.
2. Decline. It’s okay to say ‘no’ sometimes. People may want to “catch up before Christmas.” The Christmas spectacular may be playing in the park. Bottom line is, nothing is compulsory. It is okay to decline.
3. Defer. It’s tempting to set end-of-year deadlines for our personal projects, whether it’s tidying the garden or rearranging the linen cupboard. If it’s not time sensitive, cut yourself some slack. Set a more comfortable deadline.
4. Delegate. It’s okay to ask others for help. While we try to be superhuman, it can raise serious side-effects. This year I said “yes” to my Mother-in-law’s offer to cook the turkey. I then asked if she’d make the potatoes and gravy as well. I think she actually felt chuffed by the special request. (My best gravy comes from a packet.)
5. Decide. How do you want to show up? By setting our intentions early, we are more likely to succeed in aligning our energy with our desired state. And we are more likely to succeed in shrugging off the annoying distractions. This year, I’m focussing on being emotionally available, playful and connected. My pre-teen daughters won’t be this age forever. I’m going to dive in.
6. Describe. How do you want to feel? If we can conjure up the way we want to feel in advance, then our body and mind will be better placed to work towards matching that desired feeling. I want to feel calm, clear and relaxed. How about you?

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