Asking “Why” is asking for a justification.

Remember, this is not to say that all forms of justification should be completely abandoned. Sometimes, offering explanations or clarifications can be important in certain contexts. However, finding a balance and knowing when justifications are necessary versus when they are based on societal pressures or a fear of disapproval can contribute significantly to our personal growth and well-being.

We explore our actions, feelings, and behaviours as we peel back the complexity of being human and all the messiness it entails but not always understand. We seek purpose and having a purpose in life drive us towards feeling worthy.

But how do we find our purpose when we don’t know where to begin?
Simon Sinek speak a lot about finding your why.

The paradox is we want to find our ‘why’ but not begin by asking ‘why’?

Asking ourselves why we fail and why we succeed?
Why we choose our friends, or relationships?

I would say to start with:

What

How

and then your Why?

We gain a better understanding of where we are emotionally through understanding  how we can apply the right thought of questioning to the thought processes.

Instead of asking “why”, wording our questions differently will assist the mind in not justifying but searching for our truth, and it will sound like this:

• What am I? followed by
• Who am I?
• What are my goals?
• What could I have done differently?
• What are my passions in life?
• What drives this?
• Who will this impact?

Why says: explain yourself.

• “Why did you take this action?”

And when we tune into the question activating internal dialogue you’ll notice it carries a different energy:

• “Could you elaborate on what past experiences you have had which led you to make this decision?”

There’s a big difference moving from external justification towards an inner feeling; the reason and emotion behind an action.

You don’t have to justify yourself to anyone. We know there is no need to explain our reasons, but when we feel the need to elaborate, it could be an honest attempt to connect with another individual, situation, or circumstance, assisting the other to step a little further out of our comfort zone to built a rapport.

Relationships are built through connection and becoming vulnerable. It’s hard to show our true feelings and humanness and that’s what makes it so beautiful.