Relationship is Medicine to my Dancing Feet.

The most profound medicine I’ve ever experienced has consistently been found in intimate relationships.

In life, there are no ultimate right or wrong answers, no right or wrong paths to take, & yet being in relationship can bring up all the areas in which we find ourselves holding onto the ways we believe are “higher” or “lower” pathways. More often than not, it seems to prove itself to be a deep dismantling process with a potential result of complete boundary dissolution.

As beings in this life, we are always dancing, some of us maybe only slowly trudging along not understanding the steps, not understanding you make them up as you go along! Others may be ecstatically moving through space. Others may be embodying a certain archetype or character to play. Regardless, we are all dancing a dance, moving through space and time each in our own unique ways.

Every once in a while, we may glance over at someone else dancing our same time and pace. We may even sync up for a while, move and groove in rhythm and rhyme. We may, for a while, forget the dance we were dancing alone and create a completely new skip of the beat with an entirely different speed and pace. Then, perhaps we may become bored or wonder to ourselves, “what happened to that dance we were doing before?”

So, we may go back to our original stance, & we might integrate some of the new steps we learned into our dance. We may play with all the new styles for a while, feeling like a whole new different being. We may also have short small dances infusing our old and new steps into something new to tango to.

Some of us, if we open to it, may find ourselves locking eyes with someone whose dance is totally different than ours. We may feel drawn to the curious ways in which they move so abstractly or so resolutely. We may court that being, and they may court us. All the while, being careful and sometimes not so careful in just how close we get to them and their curious, eccentric and maybe even mundane ways. As we begin to try out their twisted side shuffles and teetering toe touches just to see what it’s all about. They start trying our passionately portrayed pirouettes and gentle glisses.

Each relationship is a little different in its own unique time and space that it takes to find synced up pace. When that feeling comes, it comes in like a wave. We can ride it out as long as it lasts; dancing the dance of life, with out two left feet, glimpsing if only for a moment, how every movement that used to seem odd & obscure is now in seamless flow with every beat of this newly co-created dance. A moment when our bodies are not only moving together, but breathing together, hearts pounding to pulse, feet stepping to the same time, feet that are no longer 4 feet but 2 feet. Dancing the dance of life.

It’s in these glimpses of passing moments that we may be simultaneously filled to the brim with ecstacy and deep fulfillment from feeling complete oneness while looking back at where we’ve been with longing in out hearts for what we’ve known, for what’s comfortable, for what’s familiar, for the dance we once claimed as our own. For in that dance, we were unique, separate.

In all the spaces between those two sides of the pendulum we make up stories about why we feel this or why we feel that. We may judge ourselves, we may judge the other. The paradox will always remain inside our bodies. Once we’ve felt it, it can’t be erased. Even when the time comes for us to depart this myriad of a dance and return to our own, newly shaken vulnerably cracked open style of a dance where we may not even remember where to begin, the truth will be there inside of us.

May we always carry with us all of our experiences deep in our dancing feet and the remembrance of those glimpses of total surrender to oneness and the feeling of ever present separateness. May we be continuously grateful for every new step that we learn to each new rhythm and beat; for any new dance that we learn expands the horizons of what we call home.

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