November 24, 2010

I love you, you’re perfect…now change!

You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.~ Barbara De Angelis Quotes

Personal relationships are the fertile soil from which all advancement, all success, all achievement in real life grows.~ Ben Stein


It’s your fault I’m so angry.

Have you ever felt that way? ever felt like if the other person would just pull their head…errr…if they could just be more reasonable? don’t they hear what they are saying? Can’t they be a little more understanding? patient? forgiving? giving? I mean seriously don’t they get everything YOU are going through? Selfish…*bleeeep* edited for the faint of heart.

There are times when even the best relationships feel like a burden rather than a partnership, those moments when you think…what was I thinking? Dark places that get you to wondering what life would be like single and free. Or for me those moments when I think a tibetan monestary just might be where i truly belong.




Then look inside. Sometimes it is true that what you are getting is a direct result of what you are giving. Maybe it really is about changing your approach or your outlook. Maybe, just maybe it’s YOU that needs to relax and be a little less demanding, a little more understanding and way more patient. Perhaps you could take the time to see through someone else’s eyes and meet them half way at least.

The next time you are faced with anger what if your reaction was love instead of fighting fire with fire? What if when someone did something “wrong” you didn’t get all infuriated and take it personally, instead you looked at the cause and let them know you understood? What if you let your partner be as human as you are? What if?

I invite you to try it some time soon; if you have a person that you can’t seem to get along with or a topic that is a “hot button” for your relationship (whatver type of relatiosnhip it is, love, friends, family, co-workers) If it seems that it always leads to a fight of some sort; rather than expecting or pushing THEM to change…YOU do it! We only have control of ourselves anyway so it is the only option that makes any sense. Let go of control, let go of being right, light go of needing amends even…LET GO…and watch; watch the feircness drain away, watch the anger fizzle and notice how it all seems to become less.

It isn’t always easy, I get that. We want to be right, we want what we want, (and we want it now) we want want want…but if we give give give it comes back to us so much faster, so much easier.

Let down the fight. Relax. Trust. Allow peace to come and just watch it flourish.

Or as my mom used to say “you catch more flies with honey”…

ASANA (yoga pose) For the week:

Cultivate an open and humble heart:


Sanskrit Name: Baddha Virabhadrasana
English Translation: Bound Warrior Pose
Also Called: Humble Warrior

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Aminda R. Courtwright  |  Contribution: 9,785