4.1
September 7, 2014

On the Nature of Self.

Hartwig HKD/Flickr

ONE

we walk along a beach in that beautiful time
of twilight and dusk

as we walk
our thoughts and concerns leave us
one by one
we walk farther and we become still
without even noticing it
until we step out of time
we are no longer walking on the beach
we are no longer looking at the sky or sinking sun
we are no longer watching the birds or running away from the surf

something has happened
we’ve walked out of ourselves into everything
we’ve become everything
we don’t know if the birds are circling and diving out there
or in here
we are the birds
the waves the sand the cool air the fading light the setting sun

there is no center
no boundary
no self-consciousness
there is no effort
no concern
no problem no intention no ambition
and yet everything is happening
walking breathing flying
something is aware
someone is aware
what
who
no one can say

we are the animating presence within everything
we don’t need proof
not a single thought or word to confirm it

there is too much Silence for thoughts and words
too much Silence for proof

TWO

the true nature of self cannot be known by the mind
because in the realm of the mind
everything is known in relation to its opposite

we understand tall in relation to short
smooth in relation to coarse

the mind cannot account for anything without its implied opposite
nothing can stand alone
except for one thing
only one thing is beyond the pairs of opposites
my self your self our self
the self
whose name is Silence

Silence is not intuitive
for that is part of a pair
the other part is rational
Silence is not sacred for that is part of a pair
the other part is secular
Silence is not transcendent for that is part of a pair
the other part is manifest
Silence is not eternal for that is part of a pair
the other part is ephemeral

Silence is not even absolute
for that too is but part of a pair
the other part is relative

that’s why all talk of absolute and eternal
is nonsense
life never created these
life doesn’t want things settled like this
life wants creativity and evolution and destruction
life created mystery and magic
our fears and insecurities created the rest

Silence alone and by itself in all of existence
is beyond the pairs of opposites
which is why we can’t know Silence
we can only live within it

THREE

our essence is a glowing presence
a shimmering light around everything
it is indescribably beautiful
and in the midst of this beauty we fall in love with all things
whether we see it nor not
the light of this presence shines within us

if we would just sit quietly by the open window of our heart
for a few minutes each day
soon that light would be evident to us
and soon that awesome and awakened light would heal
inspire and enlighten us

we would see reality
and become lovers and servants of reality
of love

the love of our essence is not possessive love
it is not dependent love
it is not fearful or jealous love
it is not demanding love
it is simply the magical elixir of Silence
which nourishes all of existence
from the inside out
and from the outside in

making secret pacts with every living thing
to meet late at night
or in the broad daylight

to make this love a thing
we recognize and want and desire and proclaim
as the missing piece in the puzzle of a heartfelt life
sensuous erotic tender wild caring affectionate smiling dripping and squirting

why not

FOUR

a movie is created as individual frames of celluloid are projected onto a white screen
at 24 frames per second

the projection speed creates the illusion of the movie
and its world of beginnings and endings
time and story
characters and plot
the movie seems so real
it is easy to believe in the illusion
but
if we slow down the speed of the projector
the movie becomes a slide show
if we slow it down further
we can see a lot of white screen between each image
the movie cannot be sustained
the illusion falls apart

we do the same thing in our own lives
we believe in illusions that seem so real
because of the speed with which our own minds
project the frames of thought
one after the other
until presto
we produce our very own movie
projecting thoughts concepts beliefs memories and future fantasies
on to the white screen of reality

as we slow the speed of our mind-projector
we begin to see the white screen of reality
on which we project our movie

until
finally
the illusion falls apart

and Silence remains
and this remaining Silence is
who we are

FIVE

I have a friend named Sophia
she’s four years old and she lives in the natural state
she dances and spins without regard for what others might think
she wears tiaras and her eyes glow even outside in full sunlight
she is joyful she is spontaneous and unafraid
her movements are easy and effortless
they are not governed by first or second thoughts
you can see she is still free
she speaks directly and simply
everything is revealed
her emotions are right there for all to see
and then they are gone without a trace
people stop and stare because she is so bright
they smile
and in that smile we remember and return to the natural state

it is natural to be playful and curious and open and friendly
it is natural to dance and spin for no reason
it is natural to toss cyclones of energy back and forth
it is natural to live like this
in freedom with passion and joy
petting all the animals
playing with everyone
amazed at the beauty the magic

this is the natural state
of the authentic self
shared by all

how have we become so unnatural

 

 

 

 

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Editor: Emily Bartran

Photo: Hartwig HKD/Flickr

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