May 28, 2015

I Can Love You without Caging You.


I can love you without caging you.

I can worship you and be pleased that other people do too. I can blissfully squeeze you tight in my arms without that crushing feeling of never wanting to let you go. I can say, “I want you to be happy, even if it’s not with me.”

I really do love you that much. Ready for a love this enormous?

My love doesn’t come with expectations. You aren’t responsible for making my heart sing. You just do. And when you don’t, I look within and ask myself what scrappy thoughts are causing my suffering. Because it’s never you.

You are a talented and gifted player in the heart song orchestra, but I’m the conductor. Loving me is my job, not yours.

Be kind, be thoughtful and be caring—but only if you want to. As soon as you don’t, just stop. Be honest. I’ll still love you. Don’t tell me what you think I want to hear. I am more in love with and infatuated with the truth than I am with you. Honey, the truth rocks my world in a way you never could.

The bigger the love, the tighter the grip? No. My love doesn’t come with loss of freedom. Don’t be anything or anyone for me. Do what you do. Set sail! Love the world! Don’t be true to me, that’s my job. Be truest of true to only you.

I want to get inside your heart and tummy and bones and explore every part of you. But I know that I’ll never know who you really are. How could I? You are an infinite universe of so many colorful possibilities! What will you say? What will you do? Pass the popcorn! I dread the day I am able to predict you.

When you surprise me, when you accidentally hurt me, it’s still you—the person I love. Exposing a side of you that was always there; waiting to let out an expression that wanted and needed to come out. My heart must have been that gentle, safe place for you to let that show. I can take it. I know that it’s all part of the exploration of magical, wonderful you.

I’ll take in your breath only to breathe it right back into you. I will take your love and give it back tenfold with a slice of pie and mashed potatoes. I’ll smile and gush when you walk in and I’ll cheer you on as you walk out.

And let me be clear—I hope to be one of many delicious cherries in your bowl. If I’m the biggest, brightest and juiciest one, then it means you’re missing out. And if I’m the first to love you like this, then I hope I’m not the last. You deserve more than I could ever give you by myself.

If love means you have to stay, if it means you have to make me happy, if my heart in your hands becomes a weight that is so heavy you can’t fly—then it’s me that I love, not you. I hope you believe me when I say I love you that much.



This Is What Loves Looks Like. {Pictures & Words}


Author: Lealyn Poponi

Editor: Travis May

Images: Pixabay

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