November 29, 2015

A Note to My 18-Year-Old Self about True Love.


I am not going to lie to you: it is not going to be easy.

There will be many ups and downs. However, when it concludes, and your true love emerges, you will be thankful for all the experiences and connections that lead you to the love of your life. Brace yourself for an amazing read and a ride of what is to come.

Everything that is going to happen to you is going to happen for a reason. Sometimes you won’t notice what that reason is at the time and other times it will take you months, even years before you fully understand why something happened to you.

You are going to make mistakes. You are going to be a repeat offender. You are going to do things that you are not proud of. You are going to experience a roller coaster of emotions mixed with euphoria and despair.

One day you will feel on top of the world and the very next day you may feel like you are swimming against a current pushing you backwards.

Just let go. Let the current and the water take you to a new place where there will be someone new waiting to equip you with new life lessons in love and relationships.

Your feelings will be hurt by many people. Don’t hurt them back. Don’t be a pushover either but instead be careful of your words. Be mindful of them.

Every girl you meet isn’t necessarily going to the “the one.” You may feel that way at the time with a select special few, but that will end. When it does, you may feel like they will come back to you but they won’t. No matter what you do or no matter how you try, they won’t. So don’t waste time on them when they are gone. Wish them well, be courteous and respectful. Do not burn any bridges as some will remain friends and continue to help you grow even after your intimate days end.

Look to the future. Open yourself up for new possibilities. When you least expect it, true love will find you. When it does, you will know right away. If you meet or spend time with anyone and have any lingering doubts, then know that they aren’t the one.

However, don’t be so quick to discard the ones you may have doubts with either. Love them hard. Give as much of yourself to them as possible. You will be amazed how your love is received, even by those who aren’t meant for you. They will teach you valuable lessons and expand you heart and ability to love. You will also have the unique pleasure of traveling throughout the world with marvelous company.

Go with this woman without a hesitation. Take that woman to places she has never been in return. Give generously back to her. Give her a heartfelt experience equal or surpassing what she gives you. She will deserve it.

A few of these women will teach you so much about yourself, how to live and how to love. They may need your life lessons as much as you need theirs.

It will be heart breaking to lose one or two of them, but give, live, love, and learn.

Life is balance.

You will need all these lessons so that you will be a more complete person and ready to give all of yourself to the one who is ready and willing to receive it without hesitation.

There will be someone, someday who will cross your path out of nowhere and you will know. You will know it and feel it as it will be a feeling stronger than you have ever felt in your life. It will make you question the very notion of love itself and whether you have ever truly been in love before because the rest of the world will fade away and it will only be her and you. Everything else will be white background noise.

Have faith in this and in all other things. However don’t just sit idly by and wait for this magical encounter—because you will need to experience all the imperfect relationships, all the frustrations and all the broken hearts to prepare yourself to love the one who will enter your life and open your heart wider than any woman before her arrival.

There will be magical moments that sweep you off your feet and leave you wanting more. Take and absorb all those moments because you will need the experience from them and the lessons learned so you can apply it to the magical one who will cross your path and change your life forever.

You will get discouraged and spend countless days in tears over the loss of a woman who you were convinced was your meaning for living.

It will take time. It will take patience.

Do not give up hope. Embrace your heartbreak and let your emotions run their course. When it is all said and done you will be thankful for all that you experienced and all that helped lead you to the path that you will one day be upon.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Never take your eyes off it. Have faith that the light at the end of the tunnel will be brightest and most heartfelt, soulful and spiritual fulfillment that has ever entered your being.

With all the experience you gain, you will be able to offer the best version of yourself to the love of your life that is destined for you. You will love her better than any other man could love her and your love will blossom and come to represent the very definition and essence of what true love embodies.

One day she will arrive. When she does, you will know it the moment you see her. Until then, enjoy the ride, embrace the heartache, absorb all the lessons that are offered and keep faith knowing that a true love that surpasses all is waiting for you after all the despair you experience.



Why Treating Every Lover like they’re “The One” Changes Everything.


Author: Adam Wilkinson

Editor: Catherine Monkman

Photo: LK/Flickr

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