November 5, 2015

What My Newborn is Teaching Me About FOMO.

mother son child mom parent kid

My husband and I brought our newborn baby home just two days ago.

I’m sleep deprived and in the newborn fog, but there’s something about looking into a newborn’s eyes that opens the floodgates to inspiration.

Bringing this tiny, helpless, wonderfully pure being home was like pressing a pause button on my life—at least the life outside my front door.

And now that I’ve reconciled with the idea that the world around me will still go on as I sit and rock our baby boy through feedings every two hours, especially in those 2 and 4 am feedings where the quiet is so dense it’s like a blanket draped over us, I’ve discovered something: I’m okay with it.

I used to have a really big case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out).

It’s a real thing.

Truth be told, it still sneaks up on me sometimes. And I honestly feel we’ve all been in a situation or two, or twenty, that puts the brakes on life as we know it and the business-as-usual routine we are used to grinds to a halt. This can aggravate the hell out of any FOMO feelings we may harbor. (Babies are delightfully good at this.)

The FOMO comes on strong, and master planning of what to do next makes its way in. We agree to go to everything we’re invited to, even if we don’t really want to; we say yes when we really want to say no, because it’s hard to beat that FOMO feeling.

That FOMO feeling can make us feel like we are connected to the fun of life.

The thing with FOMO is it likes to trick us into believing that contentment and fun are outside of us. Like they are a destination we have to arrive to, and as such a route needs to be plotted and planned.

FOMO is a liar.

That fear of not living a life we think we should be living keeps us locked out of the life we have. That real place where inspiration knocks on our door and we open up because we aren’t so busy keeping busy.

I’ve found, especially recently, that peeling back to the simple things in life that bring me joy (which now consist of things like taking a shower) and slowing down enough to catch up with my dreams, I also give myself time to notice the dreams that I’m already living.

These things—catching up to now and giving gratitude to what is—gives FOMO an evacuation notice.

Now when I feel that fear sneaking up on me I take it as a cue to slow down and not jump on that train that leads to nowhere but disappointment. FOMO is now a reminder that I’m getting off course and not living my truth, which is a detour I do not want to take.

It’s not about the next epic adventure or the next big thing; it’s about right now. This is where our happiness is. Let’s relish in it together, shall we?

Let’s let FOMO be no mo’.


Relephant Read:

Are You Suffering From FOMO?


Author: Danielle Vaughn

Editor: Toby Israel

Photo: Anne Worner/Flickr // Klaus Balzano/Flickr


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Danielle Vaughn