I have a bad habit of believing that every experience is going to be life altering.
This habit extends to thinking that every friendship is going to stand the test of time, that every relationship is going to be my last one, and that whatever career that I desire in the moment is what I am going to stick with for the rest of my life.
“Not everything is supposed to become something beautiful and long lasting. Sometimes people come into your life to show you what is right and what is wrong, to show you who you can be, to teach you to love yourself, to make you feel better for a little while, or to just be someone to walk with at night and spill your life to. Not everyone is going to stay forever, and we still have to keep on going and thank them for what they have given us.” ~ Emery Allen
I am trying to learn to accept that not all people or passions are meant to last forever. Some people are put here to play a temporary role. Some are meant to stay with us through the entirety of our journey and grow with us. They see us through all the good times, the bad times, and then everything in between.
However, the pill that becomes increasingly harder to swallow is to accept that some people are not meant to stay. They are meant to walk into our world and shake it up a bit, teach us a lesson, and help us get to know ourselves better.
They are the Ghosts of Christmas Past—they stop in for a moment, serve their purpose, and then gracefully make their way back to the world from which they came. It can be painful and confusing to see people we care for moving on without us—and it can be just as heartbreaking to move on ourselves at times.
I have had many people gracefully float in and out of my life. Some of their exits were so gentle that it was hardly noticed until they were completely gone. I’ve had others barrel into my life like swift and powerful wrecking balls and change everything upon impact. In such a short time, people like this can create so much change and so much possible destruction that they leave me to rebuild. Yet with reconstruction, comes improvement.
To everyone who has joined me on my journey for any amount of time—thank you. Thank you for allowing me to walk with you. Thank you to the wrecking balls, drifters, soulmates, acquaintances, and heart-breakers. I am not where I am meant to be. I have much more soul searching and growing to do and I know there will be many more drifters and wrecking balls that make their way into my little world. Knowing this, I will always try to keep in mind that everything happens for a reason—and I choose to believe that reason is my personal growth.
While I understand that some are meant to leave, I also understand that some are meant to stay. Some are there to help me rebuild each time I become damaged. I will never have enough words in my vocabulary to express how deeply I love these beautiful, constant souls. Their footprints are right beside mine every step of the way. I am grateful for my journey and for my fellow travelers who are seeing me through as I learn to embrace change.
All I can hope is that I’ll someday grow into the type of woman who leaves a little sparkle behind each time I join another soul’s journey.
Author: Emily Cutshaw
Apprentice Editor: Roseann Pascale/Editor: Catherine Monkman
Photo: Cristina Cerda/Unsplash