June 9, 2016

This is Not How our Love Will Go.

couple, sad, black and white

I will not drown in you, and you will not drown in me.

I will not relate to you with my bitter, suspicious wounds, and you will not relate to me with your most poisonous self-fulfilling prophecies.

I will not meet you in the depths of your insecurity, so please don’t meet me in the tangled webs of my most fearful parts.

I will not stuff myself down or silence my truth just to avoid upsetting you—and neither should you.

I will not fix you, and please don’t even try to fix me.

That is exactly how our love will not  go.

We are ready to turn over a new page—together—a fresh, new page that smells of hope, honeysuckle and joy.

This will be different than any love we have ever experienced before, because it has to be.

We are ready for the real thing. We won’t stand for false, unhealthy bullsh*t, like we did with previous partners.

Childish mind games, calculated manipulations and petty power struggles no longer hold a shiny, sensuous appeal.

We are ready for the real thing.

And the real thing—it takes balls. It takes heart. It takes compromise, courage and vulnerability to boot.

So let’s dive in—together. We can do this—together. Only together.

We will not abandon ourselves. We will not leave the ruby whispers of our hearts out to the wolves.

We will not tuck away our soul’s destinies or limit our freedom or slap on a fake smile for the sake of making this relationship work.

That is exactly what we won’t do.

We will love ourselves first. We will honor ourselves first. Always first.

We will chase our vividest dreams, tend kindly to the blooming lilies in our hearts and nourish ourselves, oh-so-fiercely.

We will love ourselves first. We will honor ourselves first. Always first. It’s the only way.

And then—from those sturdy, sparkling roots—we will love each other.

We will stomp our feet down and set crystal clear boundaries.

We will encourage each other, every damn day. We will inspire one another to be the absolute best versions of ourselves we can be, like the most enthusiastic cheerleaders in the world.

That is how our love will go.

It will be gorgeous, wildly fulfilling and healthy beyond belief, because we will make it so.

For I will not drown in you, and you will not drown in me.

We will swim above it all—we will soar.

Mind games, subtle hints of toxicity and stifling spurts of co-dependence—that’s exactly how this won’t go.

We’re ready to leave that sh*t behind—in the thick, distant pages of the past. Those scripted tragedies no longer need to rule our lives.

We’re ready for a love that ignites us, emboldens us and sets us free.

We’ve both had our share of painful, messed up relationships—and maybe those wounds still ache and burn—but that is now how this will go.

This is fated to be something much more purifying—medicinal, even—if we let it.

Let’s choose to remember we have a choice.

Let’s look to the warm light of the sun and feel hope cascade down our cheeks.

And be as nakedly honest as we can be.

Let’s help each other fly—

Like winged rubies

Like fiery cardinals

Just as we are meant to.

We have drowned long enough,

Crawling around in the depths of darkness—

Haven’t we darlin’?

The jeweled sky calls us now.


Take my hand.

Let’s f*cking soar.

Like the falcon souls

We truly are.

Let’s f*cking soar.

There is nothing more beautiful

Than us




Author: Sarah Harvey

Editors: Yoli Ramazzina; Emily Bartran

Photo: Flickr/Ashley Webb

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