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June 4, 2020

“Was that Too Much?” No it F*cking Wasn’t.

 

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*Warning! Naughty language.

~

I wish I could take the phrase “too much” and explode it to space.

I just caught myself, again, wondering if I was too much and honestly, now I’m mad.

Brace yourself, naughty language ahead.

Was that too much? Is that too much to ask? Did I say too much? Am I too much?

No, no, no, and fuck no!

I wish I could take every person on Earth who has ever asked these questions and dive into their brains and remove their knowledge of this phrase.

You are not too much. I am so damn sick of everybody hiding who they really are. I am so sick of everyone being afraid to show sides of themselves. Because it’s never the fake parts that we’re afraid to let out—it’s the really cool, really unique, really authentic parts. And I am sick of living in a world of clones.

We do not need you to be whatever our fucked-up society has taught you is acceptable and at an acceptable level. No. We need you to be you—as loudly or as quietly, as wild or as calm, as crazy or as mainstream as that is—at all times and at all volumes.

I am sick of constantly having to ask my friends to read my text and see if they think I said something wrong when I meant what I said. I am sick of having to ask my coworkers to look at my email to see if I said it right, when I said it exactly how I understood it.

I know this fear of being too much is bullshit. This is clearly not the first time I’ve thought about it. And I still do it. That’s how deep this fear is within us.

So, I’m coming to you. I think we need a team. We need to band together. We need to combine the dynamite of our authenticity and shoot this bullshit about being afraid to be “too much” to space.

Here’s what I know:

You are not too much. You are everything. The greatest gift I have in my life is Xray vision; I see right through the surface. I’m not guessing. I can see how many deep, beautiful layers there are to each and every one of us. I see so many layers that I believe you will live your whole life before learning all of them, but we can try.

And try is what we have to do. We have to decide that we are done with the fear of too-muchness. We are done with hiding. We are done with being afraid to be your unapologetically, unfiltered self.

Instead, we are going to dive into those layers. We’re going to dig up all of the gold and let it all out to show the world. It’s going to be shades of gold that the world has never seen before and it won’t be scary, it won’t be too much—it will be what we’ve all been craving.

When those dreaded and disgusting questions sneak their way back in, we make the decision to let our authenticity blow them up.

Because honestly, I’m afraid of living in a world where truth is shut down and pushed aside for conformity. I’m afraid of what lifeless adventure awaits when we let fear hold us back from doing what our souls desire.

What’s more, my love, is that by nature, you are abundant. You have an abundance of love. You have an abundance of divinity. You have an abundance of prosperity. You have an abundance of ideas. You have an abundance of uniqueness.

So actually, yeah, you are too much—and you shouldn’t want to have it any other way.

 

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