December 9, 2020

Why “If You Love Them, Let Them Go” is a Bullsh*t Phrase.

Every time I see that quote, I think, “Ummm, I don’t think so!”

This saying hits a nerve with me. Letting them go entirely (especially into the arms of someone else) is not a sign of loving someone.

There is still a chance to rectify the situation if I know that I can make that someone exuberantly happy. If I know that I can give that person the world and more. If I know that I can still love that person deeply.

If I know we have something irreplaceable, a one of a kind connection, then the saying loses its power and meaning.

If you absolutely love someone as you’ve never experienced before—if it’s love that has changed you for the better, a love that felt like a perfect, magical dream—then it is still worth fighting for.

Don’t send them off to some other set of arms.

Why would you pass it over to someone else to have your dream partner? 

There is no need to feel defeated. But you do need to be a little selfish here, especially when your intuition knows there’s a possibility of lingering love between you both—a chance for a beautiful reconciliation.

You are the arms that can make them feel blissfully loved and happy.

This phrase is problematic because it’s basically saying if I didn’t love them enough, then I won’t necessarily fight for the relationship. However, if I truly loved them, I’d still let them go, even if I know there’s still a chance of making each other happy.

That’s not a measure of love.

If I experienced a love that was all I’ve ever dreamt of and more and the specific person also loved me dearly—they were my soul mate, the person who made me laugh and smile every day, and we both once wanted to spend our whole lives together—then I wouldn’t give up and let them go!

But, you should also identify and improve on every aspect that caused the breakup

Where did you go wrong, and what could you work on? 

What could you both have done differently?

Then show that you are confident, strong, aligned with life and your career, passions, and hobbies.

Focus on taking great care of yourself—how you look and feel.

This is how you show the best version of yourself! If you want to be the one to make them happy, firstly, you have to love and care for yourself.

Then, and only then, can you be everything and more for them; you can be the ideal partner. 

The one who loves them as they’ve never been loved before. 

The one who takes care of them—supports and appreciates them. 

Also, remember, you are one of a kind. Your love is one of a kind.

So for this quote, “If you love them, let them go, even if it’s in the arms of someone else,” I say bullsh*t. 

If you love them as much as you say, hold them tightly in your heart. Don’t let go until they are happily back in your arms.


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