I’ve never been one to approach love or matters of the heart half-heartedly.
I simply don’t know how, and for the most part, I wouldn’t want to.
As I journeyed through my late teens to now what is soon to be my late 20s and navigated life and love, I’ve encountered and been told I’m too much or too intense by some in my idea of love, how I approach it, and how I express love itself. Others say I’m just an old soul, a true romantic, emotionally intelligent, or feel deeply as an intuitive being. At different points in time, I’ve agreed with all of these statements and can see why people might think and say this.
But I will never apologise for being me.
I envy people who can love from a distance—those who fall from afar and not spend half their time in Dreamland of some imaginative future, the euphoria of romance and all it entails. I genuinely believe that the right person and love are out there for us all. There may be multiple people at different times in our lives—perhaps a one, or ones. Everyone and everything teaches us something. I like to believe that my person, my best friend, and my love is out there searching, just like me.
This list is for the moments when it’s hard to listen to our voices and hearts—even when we know it’s right. It’s for when we doubt ourselves and wonder if we’ll ever find someone who says we’re just right, decides to hold us tighter, and embraces our gentle yet fierce hearts. This is for the one who doesn’t necessarily love the same way but hears our heart’s call, understands its tone, and embraces its call.
Until we meet, we need to be that somebody for ourselves and hold our gentle yet fierce hearts strongly and boldly with pride.
To the ones along the way who all meant something and were very nearly but not quite right, wish them laughter and love—and hope they find peace.
This list is for those days when you doubt yourself. It’s healthy, humble, and human. But don’t rest there for too long—it’s unrealistic to hold back and not fair on you, your heart, or your essence.
If you’ve ever been told you’re too much, remember these 11 things:
1. Be unapologetically you. The ones who are meant to stick around will because they want to.
2. Every encounter is a blessing and a lesson. Pain heals and in the process, write your heart out.
3. Don’t let the experiences that could, harden you. Your gentle, open, and eager heart is a blessing. Treat it as such. Don’t wait for another to hold your heart—hold it yourself.
4. Approach each new day and each new connection with curiosity and compassion.
5. Fairytales aren’t real life, but you deserve to feel like you’re in one on the good days and there will be many good days to come.
6. Hold on and tune in to your inner voice and gut instinct and never ignore what it’s telling you—it’s usually right.
7. Care less about whether you look like the fool and more that you have been true to yourself. That is what matters in the long run.
8. Continue to leave situations with truth and don’t let darkness dampen your determination for diplomacy even in the stormiest of seas.
9. Always remember that hate is just damaged love and comes from a place that needs nurturing. If you felt love once, you can like again, even from a distance.
10. Choose a path toward forgiveness wherever possible and that starts with forgiving yourself.
11. Know that timing is everything. You’re never sent more than you can handle. The universe has its plan and with each new day comes a new opportunity to trust it.