I’ve been on this “health journey” for some time now.
It’s hard to say when it began really; however, this time around, something has shifted. Perhaps it’s been since the Stillness Retreat in the Eastern Sierras with my soul family member and teacher, Jensen, that things have really changed.
Lots of space was made then.
Big decisions were made.
Ones that left imprints in the very essence of my being. Stuck and stagnant energy, which has now piled on top of previously stored traumas, has left my multidimensional self with some toxic accumulation that needs to be cleansed, transmuted, and transformed.
This time has been different—more mindful and more authentic. I’m allowing myself to be messy and continuously arrive with an open mind, open heart, and deep trust in my body’s ability to heal.
I’m approaching my healing from a place of love and grace, not fear and judgement. I’m calling upon my intuitive inner guide, my higher self, my connection to source to guide me on my path.
So far along this healing journey, I have met some of the most amazingly gifted souls—and almost all of them are nestled within our community.
Some will even do sessions with you remotely.
Some will travel.
Some are working within the energy field and we aren’t even consciously aware of it (dream work).
I’m talking pure of heart, down to earth, up in the sky, full of knowledge, openhearted healers, magicians, artists, teachers, seekers, and seers.
Some don’t even consider themselves to be healers; rather, they’re guides, containers for your own consciousness to unite with spirit so you can heal yourself.
These are real people. Real experiences.
I wanted to share my experiences with the world because healing is possible when approaching the human condition from a loving, compassionate, and gracious place.
So far, this has been a huge journey of unlearning and getting to know myself in my body over and over and over again. Every moment of awareness brings some new learning into my experience.
I was on the phone with my friend Steve talking about the PCR nasal swab test. I had sent him a video earlier in the day of a RN showing the packaged testing swabs labeled with the chemical “ETO”—Ethylene Oxide. ETO is a hazardous gas that has both acute and chronic exposure side effects. Very dangerous stuff!
Anyway, Steve and I were talking about the high amounts of fear present in our community.
I expressed to Steve my personal fear around this because last year I took a lot of PCR tests. I used to say it was for work, to make myself feel safer; however, I was afraid. I was really scared of catching anything, and even worse, I was living with roommates who were also scared. There was a moment in time when I was getting tested because it somehow made me feel better, and so I could provide them with more reassurance.
It doesn’t really matter the reasons now—what does matter was my newfound awareness around ETO. Yes, I did get a lot of tests because I was afraid. Yes, learning about the ETO present in these PCR tests. Was fear going to do anything positive for me?
Other than guiding me to a solution, fear was useless. Fear was and is an energy blocker, a restrictor, a force that—left unchecked—would take over your spirit.
This was what Steve and I were talking about. This virus feeds on fear. It latches onto the spirit and restricts the flow of the universal energy.
“Wow, yeah, that energy is definitely stuck within me. I can feel it,” I told Steve. “The fear coupled with my accidental overdose last year (different time for a different story) and residual shame—no wonder I’ve been called to do so much breathing work.”
“Have you ever tried moving your energy with your breath?” Steve asked me.
Even though I know of the many benefits, breathwork is something I notice myself resisting.
“No,” I responded.
He started guiding me through, as he described it later, a tantric energy breath practice.
“It’s all about cultivating awareness and control of your in-breath by rooting the breath in and down, and then sending your energetic exhale to the place in your body where it needs to go.
Start by breathing into your legs from the earth, trace the energy up into your pelvic floor. Lock your pelvic floor and squeeze the legs of your muscles. Keep this energy locked as you send your exhaled breath to wherever it needs to go in the body. That’s how you use breath to move energy in the body.”
I was telling Steve about this cut I’d had on my ankle that wouldn’t heal. I’d been using other energy healing modalities recently and finally had been experiencing visible results.
“I’ll put on these different binaural beats specific to what I’m working on, this time skin, and lay there and imagine that I can see each of the cells regenerate. I envision these little troops of cells bringing fresh sheets of skin to my ankle and just heal it.”
This has worked for me with different maladies in my body, even with getting rid of the hiccups. Using visualization, sound, vibration, and intention, I have experienced energy shifts and healing.
“Thank you for this magic, Steve. I am going to use this practice.”
And I have since. Earlier, I grounded my breath with my engaged pelvic floor, my uddiyana bandha, my solid foundation, and I exhaled my breath straight to my lungs, with particular attention to my left lung.
I am beginning to notice more energy flow in that area:
More stuff moving.
I could easily allow myself to feel fear around these things.
I could let fear get the best of me; however, that would greatly impede on my ability to heal, and I’ve already gotten in my own way more times than I can count.
The sensation, the crackling, the stuff moving—my awareness of these things is a gift. Now that I’m aware, the energy can be transmuted and moved. It’s another ally on my healing journey, another angel on my path.
Here’s to another day on my journey inward and onward. There is no time like the present to heal. Little snippets of my experience will be peppered in as I capture the specific healing modalities I’m engaging with.
I’m honoring the ever-changing moment, so never expect my posts to be the same! We are always shifting.
Remember, you have a light inside of you—one that never dims. At the core of that light is love. And only love is real.