Every time I share the news that I’ve met a great, considerate, smart, open, and honest guy, my friends respond with the same line, “It’s all an act; don’t trust him. All guys are players.”

They apparently love to piss on my parade.

We hate to admit it (and I think we are telling something to men that they have probably sussed out), but most women love to talk about men, relationships, and mostly the drama and problems in our relationships.

We usually discuss these “man problems” with best friends, friends, and colleagues. We hear of the infidelity of men and their issues in relationships, especially in the music culture, movies, and so forth.

We’ve somehow developed this stereotype of all men as the players, the liars, and the heartbreakers. But this is so far from the truth. We have become so comfortable bashing men as a way to bond with each other and have something in common to relate to. Why are we using this as a way to bring our female friendships closer?

Men are wonderful and necessary. They’re amazing to love and lust after, to gain motivation from, to look up to and admire. To feel cared for and loved by a man is a sparkly, warm, happy feeling.

So when are we going to stop bashing men to bring our female relationships closer?

I’ve become quite fed up with my friends who respond with a negative comment about men every time I share how my life has been wonderful ever since I met my boyfriend. Every time I open my heart and explain how attentive, affectionate, and kind he is, they shower me with, “Don’t believe everything he says. Men will always break our hearts; they are terrible, they are all the same, and they will be dishonest behind our backs and lie to us.”

Even in the past, every date I had with a gentleman ended with a similar comment from my friends. They made sure to remind me that he just wanted sex and was probably dating five other women.

When did we lose faith in men, and why are we so adamant to bash them and talk negatively about them? Why are we insisting that they’re evil, with a devil-like character, and set out to break our hearts?

The thing is it has become the norm for women to meet up for a drink, chat about how our guy isn’t doing anything right, complain about why he didn’t do this and that, and share the moments he messed up. This is becoming the main topic of conversations with our girlfriends.

Great, respectful, loving men should be celebrated and spoken about kindly.

We should be sharing our partners’ good deeds with our friends—not their downfalls.

I feel like the stigma and negativity associated with men setting us up for hurt and doom needs to stop. It shouldn’t be a topic that brings friendships together. The stereotype that they are all cheaters, liars, and heartless beings has to be nipped in the bud.

If this is the message we are passing onto the next generation as a way to bond friendships, then we need to make an immediate change.

I’m sure good men are fed up with being accused when, in fact, there are incredible, loyal, and trustworthy men out there.

Let us bond over our kindness, our dedication to help and support others, how we love ourselves and empower each other, despite what gender we are.

 

 

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