All COVID-19 aside, this year has been one hell of a ride.
I’m not even going to summarize my experience, but you’ll find out why not within the reasons below.
After all of my trials, I finally see what has been testing me. And I had an epiphany today that felt like the grand finale of subtle hints throughout the year.
My common theme has been to go within and become my own source of happiness and safety. Which honestly, I have not subconsciously been okay with for years upon years.
Within, to me, has been painful and something I try to run from. Alone has been climbing an endless mountain while weak.
Upon reflection and absorption, I’ve reached my aha moment. I’ve discovered the formula I’ve been working hard to figure out.
Detach from anything that doesn’t serve your wellness.
Starting with decluttering. I’m surrounded by things and I’m so overwhelmed by it! The memories, the space it takes up, the money I’ve wasted trying to fill a void, the work it takes to make it tidy.
When we declutter, we take honest inventory. Then we let go and keep only what brings joy or serves our needs (actual needs, not wants disguised as needs).
Detach yourself from your things, from comparisons, from outcomes, and allow yourself to let the people who you love go toward what they love. Declutter your thoughts, your phone, your home, and anything else in your life that popped up when you read “declutter or detach.”
The less you resist, the more freedom and joy you will feel! Go within and breathe life into the space you’ve created for yourself.
When you find yourself triggered or uncomfortable, and if you’ve done the work to understand your feelings and what the root cause is, you can move on to the next step: releasing.
Again, we can use breath to let it out, let it move, let it go. We need to retrain ourselves—both mind and body—to hold hands with practice, self-compassion, and grace.
When facing discomfort, know and respect your limits. As a trauma survivor, I understand that sometimes too much is just too much. And you cannot find your peace under certain circumstances. But I encourage you to keep trying. Especially once you’ve returned to your safe space.
Challenge yourself to sit with the feeling, letting go of the grip and calming your nervous system. Do this through meditation, movement (try literally shaking it off), belly breathing, crying—whatever fits your fancy and serves your personal needs at the time.
When your brain and body have left the present moment and the past is driving the train, take a moment to notice where you are. Notice that chair, the light switch, and so on. When you’re ready, close your eyes, hold your heart, and breathe deeply. Affirm to yourself that it is safe to be where you are. You’re not “there” anymore.
Which leads me to redirection. Adopt the habit of using affirmations and visualization. Creating a vision board as a reminder is helpful! Spend at least five minutes a day listing what you’re grateful for and what you love about yourself, your life, and others. Spend your mental and physical energy projecting your dream outcome. No matter how crazy it seems!
I once got through a panic attack in the shower by telling myself it was possible to find a large amount of money on my porch when I finished. Instead of saying, “I feel pain,” say, “I feel healed.”
I’ve learned and begun to understand that recreating the pain of the past in our minds recreates the past in our bodies, making it present in the now. This strengthens what holds us back.
Letting go and building a new path takes practice. It takes time. But it is worth the effort! And according to Dr. Joe Dispenza, the moment you begin is the moment you change your DNA and create new pathways in your brain.
There can be a new year, new you.
Being mindful of where we are, what we need to let go of, and where we wish to go will help us get there.
I am sending out many blessings and the best of wishes to us all as we take another trip around the sun in this human form!