We live in a world where being emotional, scared, not 100% put together can make you feel vulnerable and weak. Where chasing your dreams means you have to be 100% successful or you will be mocked, judged, or even scoffed at for coming short or failing to flourish. But if we are to be truly honest with ourselves none of us are perfect or have the perfect life even though that is what we want others to believe. We only show the good parts, the parts people can be proud of and never the parts that make us feel insignificant or small.
Those are that parts we hold inside, even sometimes from those we love the most, and those are the parts that start to eat away at our souls. But being brave in this world and being real opens the door to the hatred and the judgements of others. And yes, I can hear the eyerolls and the sighs because why should we care about those things. But I think a part of all of us does. I think some of us are braver and stronger than others and are able to will away those bad vibes and focus on inner peace and acceptance. Oh lord, do I wish I was one of those people. Seriously!
But the truth is I am seeking acceptance every day. From anyone. I don’t know what my purpose is or what role I am supposed to play anymore, and for some insane reason I keep hoping for a sign to show what direction to go. But that is just the cop out, right. We have to decide what we want and just go for it, even when we are terrified. We have to find a way to push past the fear.
But to do this we have to be strong and brave. We have to be willing to get up every time we falter and keep moving forward. We have to work on overcoming the fear of not fitting into societies perfect box and create our definition of “perfect.” We have to find the strength to keep moving forward and be brave enough to face ourselves each day. I said face “ourselves,” not society.
If I am to be honest, this is easier to say than done. I have written and rewritten this blog twice. I have let the words hit the page then disappear because of fear that some may read this and laugh or roll their eyes. But if I stop and let the fear of that judgement stop me from sharing these thoughts, these words, then I am giving in. I am letting society win and control how I portray myself, yet again.
I know I have strength. I know because I have made it this far in life no matter the hurdles. I also know that I am perfect. I still haven’t been able to truly accomplish my dreams because of fear. I fear being judged or told to be more positive, to look on the bright side. I want to be accepted so badly that I falter. I hesitate. That when life starts to get harder or people put me down, I stop, I slow down. I let their opinions and lack of acceptance dictate whether I keep pushing forward or give up. I know I am not brave enough to push past my fears to accomplish my goals, yet. But I also know it is possible for me to get there. To be both strong and brave.
So, my question for you is it enough to just be strong or do we need to be brave and strong to be fully authentic and true to ourselves and our dreams?
Below is a quote I recently found that has me pondering this and much more:
“I think it’s brave that you get up in the morning even if your soul is weary and your bones ache for a rest, I think it’s brave that you keep on living even if you don’t know how to anymore. I think it’s brave that you push away the waves rolling in everyday and decide to fight, I know there are days when you feel like giving up but I think it’s brave that you never do.” –Lana Rafaela