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So many beautiful people begin from a place of being broken.
But let’s not call it broken. Instead, let’s say that so many beautiful people who once weren’t able to move to the beat of their own drums then rise up to create breathtaking music on this earth. Their talents, their successes, and their very beings inspire us. When we accept that it’s okay to not be okay, we start dancing to a rhythm of our own.
Sadly, when we are broken, the hurt often leads us into dark space along with poor behaviours. It is the way we as humans often deal with our suffering—hurt people hurt people.
I can’t count the number of times people have been cruel. It hurts immensely. It leaves me lost in how they could possibly think it is okay to treat another like this. However, pain does terrible things to our perspective. It leaves us living in fear and in a state of negative bias. It isolates us and also dims our joy.
When we suffer, we must realise that suffering is a part of the journey. But we need to remember that projecting our suffering onto others only creates more pain in the world. We must become aware that pain can be felt but does not have to be transferred if we heal and are honest about it.
Often, when we are suffering, we start comparing ourselves to others because we are feeling particularly vulnerable. How does she effortlessly balance work and motherhood, while I’m barely keeping it together? How can I get a glamorous job like his?
Or we start judging others. Why are they doing that? Wearing that? They should do this. They should do that.
This habit of comparing ourselves with false icons or judging others is what feeds our insecurities and pain. We often don’t get to see the reality behind the veneer of the carefully curated lives we see or perceive online. If we did, we might not feel so jealous or inferior or we might not judge and realise everyone is suffering—it’s not just us.
How does this hurt us?
Those thoughts that we “aren’t doing enough” or we aren’t “good enough” can creep up on us. But we must remember they are just thoughts—that’s all they are. They are not truths.
We must remember to take a deep breath and feel our heart, our soul, and our feet rooting into the world—that’s what creates our foundations for all that is. We need to tell ourselves we are doing just fine. We are here today—living with all we have. Nobody is our competition—and that is enough.
We must tell ourselves that we are proud of who we are because we’ve always been enough and those around us are too.
So, the question then becomes, where will we devote our energy to stop the cycle of hurting ourselves further or people hurting each other?
We can spend our lives and our energy beating ourselves up for not being this way or that way, for not having this thing or that, for not being like this person or that person, or for not living up to unrealistic standards that we mistakenly think apply to all of us.
But the thing is, we embody energy, and that energy impacts the Universe. Whether or not we know it or believe it, we are constantly giving and receiving energy. And that energy has the power to either harm or heal. What we give energy to, grows. If we give energy to mocking, ridiculing, or shaming lives, bodies, and humans, then mockery, ridicule, and shame grow. But if we devote energy to love and acceptance, these too will grow.
We are much more powerful than we realize. The ways in which we use our energy can shape our reality. So, as someone once said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”
I hope one day more than ever:
>> being kind will be cool
>> being different will be our superpower
>> our differences will unite us to learn and grow
>> love will lead instead of fear, compassion will lead instead of shame, respect will lead instead of judgment, and listening with heart will lead instead of speaking our opinions to be right
Our future deserves better than this world today—as do we all.
But most importantly, I hope that we will all learn that we can make a difference. We don’t need the world to change but ourselves.
I hope we can all look within and remember our love is within. And the way we can all feel more love is to choose love toward ourselves and be the upward spiral of kindness so our own light can shine and help others to see the way.