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October 1, 2022

The Worthiness of Being Alive

Photo by James Lee on Pexels.

So much of my work is with people, one-on-one.
I love this space as so much learning happens, for me.
And one of the things I value about it as when issues come up they often come in waves, similar things that people are looking at, which allows for an exploration, a discovery, a journey into the topic from different perspectives.

One of the things that’s come up a lot recently, it’s not new, and has touched so many of us over time, is deservability, worthiness.

A few perspectives, and how this links to pleasure as a path of healing.

This is a man-made issue, a mind-made issue.
It’s part of our self-torture.
Which made me chuckle the other day, and this is a digression, we’re all sadists  and masochists, for what we do to ourselves, with consent, minus the outfits, the costumes, the toys and equipment.

Here’s a perspective.
Life doesn’t have any thought about deservability.
The sun shines on everyone.
There is rain on everyone.
Flowers share their fragrance with everyone.
‘Good’ people suffer, ‘bad’ people prosper.
We’re all worthy of everything.
And what we’ve done is think we need to do this or that, be this way or that way, be good boys and girls, listen to our parents, do well at school, work hard etc.
And of course we’ve been incredibly conditioned and socialized for this.
Which is so much about control
Which is a key element in understanding worthiness.
It’s deeply linked to control, and such a part of the illusion, of religion, of many social systems.
It keeps us struggling. It keeps us in lack, it keeps us in self-judgment.
It keeps us disconnected from love, from our own hearts.
And it keeps us disconnected from possibility.

Life is abundant.
In every way.
And the more we allow ourselves to receive from life, the greater flow we have, the greater connection to possibility we have.
And this is where Pleasure as a path of healing comes in.
Receiving pleasure in a way that’s not conditional, that’s not reciprocal, that’s not about the way your body looks, that’s not about anything other than receiving, opens doors of possibility.

There’s a principle of Conscious Sexuality that our sexuality is not separate from the rest of life.
It’s not in a little box that we take out, in very specific, often very narrow, circumstances, use, and put away again.
Our sexuality is so much more than that.
Its life, life-force, vitality, creativity.
It connects us, to ourselves, to our bodies, to our hearts.
And to life
And it’s not only about sex, about genitals, about orgasm.
It’s about the pleasure in life, the fullness of pleasure.

The next thread in this story is healing, changing, growing, expanding, through adding rather than taking away.
We tend to heal through struggle, through overcoming, through transcending. We try and do less of a particular behavior, and judge ourselves when we don’t, when we keep doing the same things.
Understanding that we live in patterns, mostly subconscious, keeps us doing what we do, thinking what we think.
There are so many inner obstacles to change, which doesn’t mean that we can’t, of course we can, it’s the way we do it that makes it difficult.
When we look at the idea of shifting perspective, adding more of a feeling, doing more of what brings us pleasure, being more aware, feeling more intimate, being more connected, relaxing more, softening more, dancing more with life, aligning more with nature, with a natural rhythm, things change.

One of the ways to do this, and it is just one, is to receive pleasure.
In my world one of the ways to do this is through touch, Conscious Pleasure Touch.
Without having to do anything, give anything back, simply receive.
Fill your body with the energy of pleasure.
It’s light.
Lighter than having to deserve, to be worthy.
You are worthy.
To be alive, to love, to live.
And pleasure is a celebration of that.
Life doesn’t have the expectations and the conditions that the people around us put onto us.
Life breathes.
The earth turns.
The wind blows.
We’re not separate from that.
We are that.
And life is filled with pleasure, simple, sensual pleasure.
Not only sensual connected to sex, sensual in the fullness of being in our bodies, feeling, sensing, smelling, tasting, touching, hearing, talking, breathing…

We talk a lot about the wisdom of the body.
I see this daily.
I see it in my life, sometimes in small ways, sometimes bigger.
It’s possible for all of us.

I’d love to share more of this journey and it’s possibilities with you.

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