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I am such an extrovert by nature and love to meet new people.
I am a people-observer, a reader of body language, a barometer for the human condition.
I see things. I see aura. I see light—and I also detect darkness.
Today, I went to my local shopping mall, grabbed my usual Starbucks latte, and just watched the world pass before my eyes. I observed my mood and my breath in that moment…and I was truly at peace. I consciously made an effort to turn off all the chatter in my mind and just concentrate on the moment at hand.
As I continued to casually saunter through the mall, I suddenly had the urge to randomly walk into a high-end jewelry store (Piaget) and ask the staff member to show me a 55,000-dollar watch that would make Brad Pitt or George Clooney drool with delight.
I started to engage the store manager in a conversation about my travels to Switzerland (where Piaget originates), and he was impressed with my knowledge about the country itself, and specifically, its exquisite time pieces.
It was within a 10-minute conversation with this total stranger that I came to a revelation: I really know how to effectively and succinctly converse with virtually any stranger and leave that person feeling peppier after meeting me. I am not trying to be boastful or arrogant, here—I like to believe I have the “gift of gab” and that I’m a true empath.
I will now disclose five tips to help you converse with virtually anyone and always leave the chat feeling calmer and more content:
1. Genuinely compliment a stranger on something they are wearing, like an outfit, a cool accessory, a pleasant fragrance.
Believe me, people love to be noticed and appreciated for their fashion sense and overall appearance.
When a stranger wears a beautiful color, a fun hat, or sports a confident swagger smelling like heaven on earth, one can’t help but notice. If you are an observant person, it’s not hard to pay someone a compliment that will not only make the other person feel seen and validated, but you will feel an instant boost to your self-esteem for taking the time to put someone else’s feelings first.
2. Pay it forward sometimes. You’ll be surprised how amazing it makes you feel.
Buy a stranger a coffee. Give a homeless person a few dollars to buy a hot meal. Donate used clothing and other items to shelters and agencies that truly need it.
I donate clothing twice a year, and I always think of how others who are less fortunate would benefit greatly from the kindness of strangers.
3. Be the initiator of an obscure, thought-provoking conversation with a total stranger.
Even if you don’t know much about the new topic you’ve introduced, you just might uncover some gems.
I went to a lovely restaurant and started to engage in a conversation about alternative music with this bright and energetic young fellow. His knowledge base and passion for the music industry was so vast and on-point, that I spent the next hour enthusiastically adding to the conversation. I sincerely had a blast, and I made a total stranger light up by contributing to a topic he was enamored by already. Plus, I instantly made a new friend.
4. Know that if you show a stranger your vulnerability within the first 10 minutes of meeting them, chances are they will feel comfortable and willing to do the same.
If you mirror positive emotions to a random person, you will have it reflected back to you. The same is true if you are negative and rude. You will likely be treated the same way you treat others. Choose joy and kindness, not sarcasm and curt replies.
5. This one’s gold: when you meet an intriguing and beguiling new person, know that if you feel a positive vibe between you, that’s the universe telling you that your chance encounter is about to teach you some kind of a lesson.
It could be a “flash in the pan” tutorial, it could turn into a fun and casual friendship, or it could be the start of something sacred and beautiful. Intimacy comes in all forms—and it’s particularly unique and ultra special if you immediately gel with someone brand new and develop rapport on a deep level.
Since restrictions from COVID-19 have eased world over, I have met and made instant connections with more strangers than I have in many years. It feels incredible, actually.
In a nutshell, we’re all due for more genuine human interactions, connections, and beautiful bonds.
Hey, stranger things have happened.
God bless you all, and thank you for reading.