February 2, 2023

I Used to Think Breakup Revenge was Cool—Until I Met You.

I used to think breakup revenge was cool, until I met you. 

After every breakup, I would do the inevitable post-breakup haircut.

Keep busy in the gym working on the revenge body…cause apparently nothing says “f*ck you” more than a six-pack.

Who the hell came up with that anyway?!

Maybe get myself a new job.

Heck, I’ve bought a new car after a breakup! 

You name it, I’ve probably done it. 

All in the name of moving on. 

In the name of payback.

Ah, that sweet sweet liberation. 

You better believe I was going to make you wish you never left. 

I was hell-bent on showing that I was better off without you. 

To make you sorry you didn’t treat me better.

I’d pour all that energy into transforming myself.

All that energy was just to prove something. 

To prove I was amazing. 

To prove I was worth missing. 

To prove you had something incredible and you were dumb enough to let it go. 

I wanted you to realise you f*cked up.

To regret your decision and want me back

So that I could turn around and tell you I’m better off.

But this time, this time was different. 

There was nothing to prove.

You saw it all, just as I am. 

I didn’t have to change for you to see the amazing woman I am. 

When we were together, I was never left wondering how you felt about me, or if you liked me. 

I never questioned if I was important to you.

I never had to chase your affection.

You were there.

If you knew where I came from, you would see 

What a breath of fresh air that was. 

When you left 

There was no payback to be had.

No trying to make you miss me 

Because you told me you did. 

I thought breakup revenge was cool, until I met you. 

Being with you turned me into a real adult. 

It’s opened a part of me that I didn’t even know existed. 

A part that I’ve spent a lifetime running from. 

That has over-functioned for men. 

So willing to accept breadcrumbs.  

I will walk taller in this world because you were once here to show me what’s possible.

Being with you was everything I didn’t know I wanted but turned out to be everything I needed.

Even if only for a short while. 


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