The entire month of March, including the few weeks leading up to it, are always emotional for me.
It’s like I can feel the grief rising in my throat long before I realize the date on the calendar.
Back in March of 2017, I lost my grandfather and my aunt within eight days of each other. I watched my mom grieve her dad and her baby sister. I watched my grandma grieve her husband and her daughter.
Over the next two years, I found myself grieving the loss of more family (including both of my grandmas), one of my closest childhood friends, and my beloved chocolate lab.
And then I watched my family slowly unravel.
There are moments when the grief feels like a dull buzzing in the back of my mind. And at other times, the grief feels like driving down the highway with the bass thumping at full blast.
Finding a way to wade through all that loss without getting pulled under felt like a full-time job. And on the days when it seemed like I was working overtime, music was one of the things that helped me get through.
There’s nothing like finding a song (or a quote or a piece of advice) that helps you honor the pain and the person without drowning in the loss.
And that’s where I found myself while listening to Pink’s latest single, “When I Get There.” The song, which she released on Valentine’s Day, is a beautiful, hopeful tribute to her father, who died in 2021.
As Pink expressed in an Instagram caption:
“Sometimes love leaves us too soon. On Valentine’s Day – I cherish the love I have that I can touch – and the love I have in my heart for those who have gone on to the next adventure. This one’s for you, Daddy Sir.”
Listening to this song felt like a salve for my grieving heart:
“I think of you when I think about forever
I hear a joke and I know you would have told it better
I think of you out of the blue
When I’m watching a movie that you’d hate
And you’d say it
You were never one to hesitate
You were always first in line
So why would it be different for heaven
But I got a couple questions
Is there a bar up there
Where you’ve got a favorite chair
Where you sit with friends
And talk about the weather?
Is there a place you go
To watch the sunset and oh
Is there a song you just can’t wait to share?
Yeah I know you’ll tell me when I get there”
A few powerful comments from YouTube:
“A heartbreaking and at the same time healing song. P!nk’s music does that, helps you to live with that pain without losing the will to live.” ~ @casckettfriki
“I lost my dad in July 2022…I’ve not cried like this since his funerals…I needed this.” ~ @murronwinter4278
“Anyone who has experienced a great loss, this song fills in those words that just can’t seem to come.” ~ @marjoriethomas8255
“All I can say is that I’m glad I was alone when I first listened to this! Snot and sloppy tears everywhere. This song hits me in the heart for so many lost loved ones, so now I just have to decide if I’m crying because I’m sad to think of the losses, or happy to think of my reunions.” ~ @deborahgoodwin9187
“What a powerful song. My grief is sometimes so big, but these lyrics package it up a little and give it room to nod along.” ~ @Bullie4u