Last year, I had a couple of difficult experiences happen at the same time.
I noticed that while it felt hard and painful, it also wasn’t as hard or painful as I would have thought it would be.
Along with the natural fluctuations of emotions and feelings that I think anyone would experience, I noticed that I had a soft steadiness inside, a sturdiness, an acceptance. A deep part of me accepted what was happening.
I let myself be with the experience, with all parts of the experience. I really sat with it all, felt it all, allowed it all—and I focused on the opportunity, on how I could move into this space intentionally, consciously, in the ways that felt right to me.
I could see some of the opportunity that was being given to me—what I’d have to face, some of the lessons I’d have to work through and learn, and also some of the goodness, the beautiful things I could do and see and experience.
This didn’t mean that I didn’t feel uncomfortable emotions or that things didn’t feel difficult at times—but I could sense the the potential, the opportunity within the space of what was happening. And the more I moved with what felt right in each moment, the more peaceful and connected I felt.
The most important thing we can do for ourselves is connect to ourselves, to move with feels right and true for us.
When something challenging or difficult happens in life, it can be hard to see the wider picture in the moment, the opportunities that linger within and on the other side of those challenging experiences.
But if we hold a willingness, if we’re curious and open, we can sense some of the potential. And if we can really be with ourselves, settle into the space where we are, we can connect more deeply to ourselves. And we may even be able to see or feel some lightness—like the deep, warm peace that comes from being present and the little magical simple things we experience each day.
Each moment of our lives leads to the next, and often, if we look back, reflect on the past, we can see the steps that led us to where we are now.
But what’s really magical is to see what’s unfolding while it’s happening—the lessons that we’re being presented with, the opportunities.
We might not see or know or understand all of it, but we can sense, feel, see something.
And this is so powerful because it helps shift our perspective on what we’re going through. Instead of only feeling the hardness of it, we can feel lightness, some peace, and the love that arises from within us when we’re deeply connected to ourselves. We can see the goodness that is around us and in our lives.
And we’ll see that we can feel present and light, while also still feel the pain of whatever challenges are occurring. It can all exist, and we can be with all of it.
How we look at a situation determines how we feel about it. How we view life and our experiences shapes how we feel about them and how we take them in. If we can look for the opportunity—even if that opportunity is to simply be with ourselves, hold space for ourselves, experience what is happening in the present moment—it can give an ease, a grace, a softness to what we’re going through.
Some things are challenging, some moments are painful, but if we can look from an expanded perspective, if we can want to learn and understand and sit quietly with ourselves and reflect, we may also find that we feel a soft sturdiness inside, a stability, a calm, a beautiful inner knowing—that we’re on the right path, that we’ll be okay, that things will work out.
We’ll see that we can find joy and lightness in the simple little beautiful things that happen each day.
We’ll gain clarity.
We’ll find a deeper connection to ourselves.
We’ll find that we can really be with all of our experiences, that we can allow it all.
So, the next time you go through something that feels challenging, see if you can pause and center yourself, settle, and look inward. How do you feel? What feels right to you? What’s the opportunity for you, the potential? What lingers here?
How can you expand your awareness, your perspective?